Life Goes On: Merry's Big Decision Part II
by Pippinfan1988
Summary: Just as the title says...life goes on; the world doesn't stop for grudges or anger. And neither does Merry....
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: These lovable little hobbits are not mine; they belong to the genius, JRR Tolkien. This story goes somewhat against my other stories, but oh, well. I can always go back to clean up, so to speak. This will probably be my last story for a long while, and so I wanted some sort of closure for Merry. This story is no where being finished, so I always welcome constructive criticism, or other fantastic ideas. Here are the first three chapters....thanks Natta!

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LIFE GOES ON: Merry's Big Decision Part II

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Chapter One: What's Next?

Merry walked down the hallway towards his room at Whitwell, and was assisted by his Uncle Paladin. It was slow going, as he placed his hand against the wall to keep his balance. He had just arrived from his brief, two-day recuperation at Bag End where he and his young cousin Pippin took a spill down the backside of The Hill. He and his cousins were attending Frodo's 30th birthday party when for reasons unknown to Merry at the time, Pippin had climbed the huge tree on top of the hill. Pippin had a tummy full of ale when he jumped from a great height out of the tree and subsequently broke his wrist. Merry tried to catch him before he landed, but he miscalculated, and instead Pippin landed right on his head. Merry didn't recall too much after that, but when he woke up the following morning he remembered having the worst headache of his life--intensified by the presence of an estranged father. 

By early this morning, Merry's headache had tapered and the nausea was gone. He was actually able to get up for an extended period of time; making a trip outside--assisted by Frodo--and then ate breakfast before he left. However, his headache was brought back in force from the jostling ride back to Tuckborough. As he made his way down the hall, another wave of nausea hit him--and all he could think of was getting inside his room so he could....so he could..............and out it came. Merry didn't quite make it to the basin in his room; his breakfast was now splattered all over the floor in front of him and down his shirt. He felt the strong arms of his uncle sweep him up off his feet and carry him the rest of the way down tunnel to his room.

Paladin quickly found that Merry wasn't quite the little lad he used to be--and neither was he! He was laboring a little as he made it to the end of the long tunnel. "Pearl!", Paladin called after his eldest daughter, "Come here, lass! Open the door and help with the bed covers, please." Then he called over his shoulder, "And take heed for the mess!"

"Yes, Father!", Pearl winced, "I...see it!" She caught up with her father and twisted the door handle, letting the door swing wide open, and then she quickly went to the bed and turned down the blankets.

She checked the water pitcher on his bureau; "Father, I'm going to fetch fresh water.", she said.

Paladin nodded, "Thank you, Pearl!" He carefully sat Merry on the bed and helped him take his shirt off. "Are you feeling any better, Merry?", he asked as he unbuttoned the shirt.

Merry's stomach still felt uneasy, and he closed his eyes, "Ask me that again later!" He held out his arms as his uncle took off the soiled garment.

"That I will!" Paladin said as he reached inside Merry's wardrobe for a clean nightshirt. "Well, at least your color is coming back!", he said as he slipped the clean nightshirt over Merry's head. Paladin then held onto Merry's arm as he stood, "For a moment out there you were as white as your pillow cover!", he said. 

Merry let the hem of his nightshirt fall to his knees before he unfastened his trousers and let them drop. He sat back down on the bed and let his uncle take his legs out; Merry felt absolutely no strength for the task. He lay back onto the pillows and brought the covers over himself. "I feel so drained!" 

"You should--you left your stomach out in the hallway!", Paladin smirked as he tucked in the blankets. "I'll make certain no one disturbs you for a while, but I will check in on you after supper."

Pearl returned with a pitcher full of fresh water, poured some into a mug and placed it on the table next to Merry's bed. She took a cloth, moistened it and wiped around Merry's face; she also placed the basin on the table nearby; "In case you have that..._feeling _again!", she smiled.

"Thank you." Merry whispered.

After his uncle and cousin left him alone in his room, he immediately felt the peace and quiet calm his head and stomach. As sleep stole him away, he could hear a still, small voice echo in his head_, "...You are the flower of my meadow and the star in my sky, but do you know this? ..."_


	2. An Indoor Picnic

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Chapter Two: An Indoor Picnic

When Merry woke up, he was lying on his stomach; he lay for a while in that position until the fog lifted from his brain. It was a clear sunny morning; he could tell by the way the little specks of dust floated in the bright rays between the drapes. He watched the specks float for a while, then felt his stomach growl and decided see about breakfast. He raised himself to his elbows, and then heard knocking on his door. "Come in", he said, as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

The door creaked open, and a small figure with light brown curly hair peeked around the edge, "Are you awake, Merry?"

"Yes", Merry replied as he stretched his cramped muscles. "What time is it? And what's for breakfast?"

"It's almost ten o'clock," Pippin replied as he entered; "you missed breakfast, and Dahlia's just now preparing for elevensies." He sat down on the edge of Merry's bed. "I know she will give me something for you to eat; she's looked in on you twice already!"

"Good", he yawned, "because I'm hungry!"

"Surely _that's _a good sign!", Pippin smiled. "Do you still have your headache?"

Merry nodded, "Only a little, though--much like it was before I left Bag End."

Pippin nodded and stood up, "I'll be back before long with a tray", and left the room.

After Pippin left the room, Merry got up and tiptoed over to the window and threw open the drapes. He immediately regretted it; the bright sunlight instantly stabbed his eyes and he quickly covered them with his hands. _Ow!, _he thought, _that was real clever!_

Next, he went over to his wardrobe, pulled out a clean pair of trousers and pulled them on. He decided to wash his face and brush his teeth before he put on a clean shirt. 

Just as he was finishing up, Pippin came back in and looked about the room, "You'd better get back in bed before Mrs. Longbottom sees you!"

Merry spit out the rinse. "The healer? Why should _I _have to get back in bed? You're the one with a broken wrist!"

"And you're the one with a broken head!", Pippin answered.

Pervinca walked in behind her brother carrying a tray laden with food. "She's here to look at the both of you! Papa just returned from getting her in Tuckborough." She set the tray on a small table and pulled it up next to the window. "Pippin, go and get the chair from your room", she said, then proceeded to set about taking the two existing chairs in the room and put them by the table she had set up.

"What are you doing?" Merry curiously watched as his cousin carried a chair across the room to the table. 

"We're going to have a picnic indoors!" She announced. In came Pippin dragging a chair with his good arm.

"But I thought you and Pippin already had breakfast."

"We did," said Pervinca, "but we didn't want you to be lonely eating all by yourself, so we decided to join you."

Merry laughed, "You mean you both thought this would be your chance to get in an extra breakfast!"

Pervinca and Pippin both looked at Merry in feigned shock. Pervinca turned to her brother, "Pippin, did you think of _any _such thing?"

"Why, no!" Pippin played along, "My sweet sister and I only thought to accompany our dear, beloved cousin in partaking of refreshment!"

It cheered Merry enormously to know that his two cousins cared enough to sit with him through yet another breakfast--even if it was planned ahead of time! Remembering his manners, he smiled as he bowed--still wearing his nightshirt and trousers, then he stepped up behind Pervinca and like a young gentle-hobbit, he held her chair.

In turn, Pervinca, curtsied to her "suitor" wearing her dress and empire pinafore, then she sat down as Merry slid the chair underneath her.

Pippin watched the scene before him, then acted surprised as Merry went to his own seat. "What about me?", he jested as he settled into his chair.

"What about you?" Merry said as he grinned; he was sitting in his seat and put his attention to spreading jam over his biscuit.

"I see how you are Merry!" Pippin laughed, "Next time I'll bat my eyes and wear a huge green bow in my hair! _No, wait_! Someone's already done that to me!!" Pippin looked at his sister who nearly choked as she swallowed her food.

Pervinca laughed, "Pim made me do it! She said that if I didn't, she'd do something horrible to me!"

Pippin grinned; "That's all right; I already did something horrible to her!!", he said 

Merry burst out laughing when he remembered the mustache Pippin drew on Pim's lip. "You should've seen her, Pip! She was furious at you!"

Pippin was pouring more water into his mug, "I know! That's why I bolted!" 

On and on the nonsensical chatter went. Three young hobbits, enjoying breakfast by the window in the autumn sunshine...and each other's company. 


	3. Three's A Crowd

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Chapter Three: Three's A Crowd

"It's not fair!", Merry looked dejected; he lay in bed scowling at Pippin, wearing his cloak as if to go outside after Mrs. Longbottom left. "You get to go outside and look at all the trees turning different colors, while I lay in this wretched bed another day!"

"Can I help it that Sam's mother did such a great work on me?" Pippin proudly held aloft his wrist with splints and bandage. "And I never cried once!"

Merry didn't believe that story for a second! "I heard Frodo and Pearl had to hold you down!"

Pippin rolled his eyes, "All right, it _did _hurt just a little!"

Pippin watched as Merry gazed out his window to the brilliant red, gold, and orange leaves, and then said, "All I want is to take a small walk outside and breathe in the fresh air."

"I've got an idea!", Pippin said, as he stepped over to the window and opened it.

A cool breeze fluttered the drapes, and Merry drank in a breath of crisp, clean air. 

"So do I!", Merry replied. He laid aside his blankets and scurried over to his wardrobe where he pulled back on his trousers and found a clean shirt.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking, cousin?" Pippin grinned.

"I'm one step ahead of you!", Merry replied as he took off his nightshirt. "How far is the drop from the window?"

Pippin leaned out and surveyed the small decline, "Maybe three feet, and then we can slide down the rest of the way, which isn't far at all."

Merry strapped on his braces, then quickly threw on his overcoat. "I should go first; I don't think I shall trust your judgment of distance for a while!" He leaned over the windowsill where Pippin was just moments before, swung over one leg at a time, then jumped. He landed on the soft grass under his window, then waited for Pippin. At three-foot and three-inches, all Merry had to do was let Pippin lean into his grasp and carefully ease him to the ground; he didn't want to re-injure his cousin's wrist--no outing would be worth that.

The two young hobbits cautiously made for the backside of the barn before heading out in the direction of the woods.

"Merry! Pippin! Where are you two heading off to?" Pervinca stepped out from the barn and into the sunshine, setting down two pails. Gone was the pinafore and pretty green hair bow she wore at breakfast. She now wore a simple work dress with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows. The sunlight caught the highlights in her curly golden-brown hair as she smoothed it out with her fingers, and then re-tied it with a leather thong. Beside her on the ground sat the two large buckets; they were filled with water for the troughs in the barn. "I thought you were to stay in bed, Merry?"

Pippin and Merry looked at one another; in the midst of their escape, neither had anticipating running into anyone. "Er, well...," Pippin started, "he's coming with me to...visit the ponies!"

Pervinca crossed her arms and shook her head, "Did you think I was born yesterday, Pippin? You usually come up with something better than that!"

Merry couldn't lie to his sweet cousin. "We're going for a short walk; I couldn't take the stifling air in my bedroom any longer!"

Pervinca smiled broadly, "Take me with you!"

"No!", cried Pippin. "This is a lad's journey, and you're a lass!"

Undaunted, Pervinca pulled out her trump, "If you don't take me with you, I shall scream until Mother hears me! Then you two will be caught in the very act of escape!" She smiled at her own cunning.

Merry tried another angle, "_Dear _Pervinca--we don't wish to interrupt your chores! We'll go on ahead, and when we return we shall tell you everything we did and everything we saw!"

"Not on your life!" She rolled down the sleeves of her dress and buttoned the cuffs. "And don't '_dear'_ me, Merry Brandybuck! You had better take me with you or you will regret it!"

__

I already do!, he thought to himself.


	4. Careless and Carefree

So much going on at work! All this week I've worked on this, and I've only got three chapters to show for it! That's what I meant by it'll be a while before I do anymore new stories...thanks to all!

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Chapter Four: Carefree and Careless

Merry and Pervinca sat on the bank of the stream and dabbled their feet in the cool waters that rushed by. They watched as Pippin skimmed some flat stones he found along the stream, and cheered him on when they skipped more than five times.

Pervinca filled her lungs with the autumn breeze and closed her eyes, feeling the warmth of the sun on her face. It was so peaceful here; no bossy sisters screaming orders in her ear. She opened her eyes to the colorful hues in the trees that lined the stream on the far side. She let go of her arms that propped her up and dropped on her back, gazing up at the clear blue sky, "It's so beautiful here, Merry! I'm glad you let me come along!"

Merry looked back at his cousin laying on the grass, "Well, I can't say that we felt obliged to bring you," then he smiled, "but I'm glad you came along, too."

"Hey!" Pippin yelled from his spot down stream. "You two missed it! I made the stone skip eight times!" He ran back up to where his sister and Merry sat.

"Do it again!" Pervinca said.

"I can't do it again! I'd have to find another rock just like it!"

"Well go find one!"

Pippin plopped next his sister, "_You _go find one! I'm going to take my ease and laze in the sun as you have!"

"If I find a smooth slim stone like the one you just threw, I get half of your dessert tonight at supper!"

Pippin eyed his sister in the sunlight and chuckled, "That's assuming we get dessert! If we're caught, it'll be a long time before either of us gets dessert!"

Pervinca got up and walked down the bank a ways. Thirty seconds had not passed before she ran back holding out to Pippin her treasures, "Look! I found four very thin rocks--and look at that one!" She turned over the fifth rock and let glitter in the sunlight the various colors it held. "This one must be worth more than fifty silver pieces!"

"No, Pervinca," Pippin pointed to the slender rocks, "those four rocks won't do!", Pippin instructed. "They must have a _smooth _surface--and the more _evenly _thin the better."

"Oh.", she replied, but she was persistent, if nothing else. "Wait! Hold this pretty one while I go find more!" And off she went.

Pippin had taken her rock and winked at Merry as he handed it to him, "She'll be a while! It's time to take a nap!"

It wasn't long before he heard Pippin's deep breathing next to him. Between the warmth of the sun and the gurgling sound of water running over rock, Merry found himself lulled into a hazy half-awake dream.

Then he heard it; a splash followed by a high-pitched yelp. In an instant he was on his feet and gazing down the bank. Sure enough, there was a small figure thrashing in the water, sputtering, "Help!"

Merry sprang into a run downstream until he was level with his cousin. "Hold on!", he yelled to her.

Pervinca bobbed in the water, "Merry!", she sputtered and gasped, "Help me! I can't..." Down she went again.

Merry trembled with fright, but overcame himself. As he ran alongside the stream, he spotted a clear path in the water and plunged in. The undertow proved a bit more than he imagined, but he was a strong swimmer, and soon caught up with his struggling cousin.

Pervinca was still splashing as he tried to gain a hold around her, "Stop, Pervinca! If you keep struggling, we'll both go down!"

Pervinca calmed down some, and clutched at her cousin's arm. She gasped for air and coughed as Merry kicked his feet and swam with one arm towards the bank.

Pippin was waiting on the edge of the embankment and leaned out to grab an arm, but instead settled for a handful of his sister's dress. He tried to haul her up with his one arm, but his meager strength was no match for someone five years older than he; so all he could do was hold her so she wouldn't drop back under the water.

Merry got up out of the water while Pippin had a hold on Pervinca, and leaned out next to him to help lift her up. He was out of breath and had little strength left. "I know you're spent, Pervinca, but you must help us! When we pull, you need to push up as much as possible!" Merry looked at Pippin who nodded. "Ready?" He saw Pervinca nod as well. "PULL!", he yelled. It was a bit of a struggle, but between the three hobbits, Pervinca was safely brought up on dry land.

She lay on the deep grass curled up on her side--tired and soaked through to the skin. She shivered as the cool breeze blew over her wet clothes and skin, then she covered her face and began to cry in the aftermath of her rescue.

Merry heard the muffled sniffles as he wiped the dripping water away from his face. "Pip, go and get my overcoat please." As Pippin ran to get their coats, Merry helped Pervinca to sit up and held her as she cried. "It's all right! You're safe now!" Merry let her cry a few minutes more until Pippin came back. "Come on--let's stand up and head back home!"

Pervinca stood up and wiped her tears. "I'm sorry!", she sniffed, "I'm afraid I've been more a nuisance than a companion!"

"Nonsense, Pervinca!" Merry put his overcoat around her shoulders, "Anyone of us could have fallen into the water!" He tried to make her smile; "Take for example...Pippin, here!"

Pippin made no answer; he was already walking in the direction of home.

Pervinca stopped her older cousin mid-stride as they followed, "Thank you, Merry!" Then she stood up on her toes and gently kissed Merry on the cheek.

Merry blushed and smiled. "You're welcome! Now do I get half of your dessert?

"Yes," She laughed, "I will give you Pippin's half!"

"But that isn't your half to give!" Merry teased his cousin.

"Oh, yes it is!" Pervinca smiled, "That brother of mine sent me on a wild goose chase!"

They were almost home when Merry yelled ahead. "Pippin! Wait up! What's your hurry?" 

Pippin slowed down, but he kept on walking ahead of them. Then he felt a hand on his shoulder turn him around.

Merry was caught off-guard at the sight of his cousin's tears. "Pippin, what's the matter?"

"Nothing." said Pippin, wiping his eyes.

"Something's wrong!", Merry said.

Pippin sighed at having to explain the obvious. "Pervinca would never have fallen into the water if I hadn't sent her there!"

Merry tried to convince Pippin it was all an accident, "How do you know this?" Pippin looked away. "How do you know she wouldn't have fallen in anyway?"

Pervinca watched the exchange and knew what her brother was upset about. "Pippin....I wasn't looking for your skimming stones; I was looking for more of the pretty ones!" Pippin sniffed and wiped his nose, then looked at his sister. Pervinca smiled as she looked back at her brother, "You thought you nearly sent me to my death, didn't you?" She walked up to Pippin, "Come here, you ninny!", and reaching her arms around her brother, she gave him a big hug.

"Merry!" All three looked towards the barn still in the distance, and saw a pony approach.

"It's Pearl!", said Pervinca as the pony came near. "We've been found out!"

"Where have you three been?!", Pearl shouted. "And what have you children been doing--all of you are soaked to the skin!"

"Not all of us", replied Pippin, "only those who chose to go swimming!"

"Swimming?" Pearl was shocked, "What in the Shire would possess you to go swimming--and at this time of the year? Especially when you don't know how to!"

"Pippin!", Pervinca nudged her brother, "You're making it worse!"

Pearl eyed her siblings and then her cousin, "Get you three home--_now_! Mother has had Pim and I out searching for you this past hour! She's worried sick!"


	5. Paying the Piper

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Chapter Five: Paying the Piper

Paladin paced in front of the couch in his study; all three children were lined up sitting on it--Merry and Pervinca were now dressed in dry clothes. Paladin had a method to his pacing; he knew it filled each child with the dread of what was to come--the exact effect he was looking for. Paladin was aware that three pairs of young eyes followed his every move. 

Both he and Eglantine took their parental responsibilities seriously. It was up to himself and his wife to ensure their brood was well brought up and behaved respectably. Running off without telling a grown-up he considered the worst offense; especially when they knew it was the wrong thing to do. He could deal with a saucy child, and he could deal with tantrums. And when it came to their safety, he made sure he dealt with that, too; because if anything ever happened to any of his children, he could never forgive himself. 

He paused momentarily in his pacing, put his pipe down on a nearby table, and blew out a long tendril of smoke.

"I'm very disappointed in you, Meriadoc," he finally said, and he then looked at his son, "and you, too, Peregrin." He stood with arms crossed, "I would swear that we had already been through this just last week!"

Merry swallowed down the anxiety in his throat at what he was about to do, but he felt he had to do something; it was his fault they got into this mess. If he had stayed in his room as he was told to do, neither of his young cousins would be sitting here. He took a deep breath, "Uncle Paladin...sir. May I say something?"

Pippin and Pervinca both looked at Merry as if he were utterly mad. _Now we're in for it!_, Pippin thought to himself.

Paladin glared at his nephew, "Be quick!"

"Sir," Merry's knees quaked as he stood up, "if each of us is able to give one good lesson we've learned today, will you forgo the swatting?

Paladin stood without a sound and thought on this. He knew Merry stood up because he believed himself to be the one responsible--and inwardly, Paladin agreed. Merry was the one told to stay in bed; if he had done so, Pippin and Pervinca wouldn't have been so inclined to follow him. 

The silence was eating at Merry_; Now what have I done? I've really brought it on this time!_

Paladin decided to play along with Merry's idea. After the long arduous silence, he finally spoke: "I will forgo the swatting _if I deem the lesson good enough_." Then he walked in front of Pippin. "You will be first, Peregrin."

Pippin licked his lips in nervousness; _Why am I always first?, _he thought as he stood. He was a natural for thinking on his feet, and for all the outlandish "lessons" he could tell his father he learned, he opted for the truth: "I....", he faltered, "I, um....I thought I was the one at fault for Pervinca's fall into the water. And I felt horrible knowing that for a split moment...." He looked at his sister, "...there was a chance she wouldn't be alive now." Tears sprang from his eyes and he wiped them away. "Both she and Merry could have drowned and....and..." Pippin couldn't finish, and sat back down with his head in his hands.

"Pippin!", Paladin called, "You may go. But we will speak later."

Pippin was still wiping he eyes as he stood up from the couch and left; he could be heard sniffling as he closed the door behind him. Pervinca and Merry were left.

Paladin next nodded to his daughter. "Pervinca, now you will tell me what lesson you learned today."

She looked at Merry as she stood up before her father, eyes wide open. She was not as adept as her brother in thinking on her feet, so she did as she always did: she told the truth. She spoke in a small voice that could barely be heard: "I learned that," she started.

"Speak up, child!" Paladin interrupted her, "I cannot hear you."

Pervinca cleared her throat and tried to speak a little louder. "I learned that I've behaved foolishly today; I knew that we shouldn't have gone so far without telling a grown-up." Then she glanced at Merry sitting beside her, "And I will be forever grateful to my dearest cousin.", then she added, "and before I go near another stream, I will learn how to swim first!"

Paladin inwardly smiled at his daughter's last statement. "Very well, Pervinca; you, too, may go."

Before her father could change his mind, Pervinca quickly made her exit. It was just Paladin and Merry left in the study.

Paladin stood in front of his nephew, "And what, pray tell, have you learned today, Merry?"

Merry stood up and addressed his uncle; "That I am the one who disobeyed Mrs. Longbottom and Aunt Tina, and that I am responsible for all that happened today."

"Well put." His uncle said. "And do you believe I will dismiss you for taking full responsibility?"

"No, sir."

Paladin reached inside a desk drawer and pulled out a long narrow paddle. He motioned for Merry to turn around and bend over. Merry did as instructed and grimaced at the expectation of several stinging blows. 


	6. A Grateful Piper

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Chapter Six: A Grateful Piper

Merry was waiting to hear the wind and feel the sting of the paddle. He felt nothing. He was still bracing for impact when he heard his uncle sit down in a chair somewhere nearby. Not knowing what else to do, he remained bent over.

"Do you _want _me to swat you?" Merry heard his uncle at the far end of the study. He looked up and saw that Paladin had put away the paddle and had sat in his favorite overstuffed chair, re-lighting his pipe.

Not one to take unnecessary risks, he stood straight up, "No, sir! But I thought..." Merry stammered.

"I know what you thought," he puffed, "and you deserve some sort of punishment for upsetting your Auntie, but I've decided the last swatting you received was indeed your last." 

Merry took his uncle's remark to mean he was washing his hands of him, "Very well, Uncle, I will begin packing at once."

Paladin observed the grim expression on his nephew's face, "Why? Do you plan on running away?"

Merry hesitated. "No, sir", Merry answered, "Will you not _send _me away?"

"No, Merry," He said, "You will not be sent away."

"Then what shall my punishment be?", Merry asked.

"You will be restricted to the Smial for three days.", Paladin answered. He saw Merry's face become ashen. "How is your head today?"

"Fine, Uncle." Merry said.

Paladin knew Merry wasn't entirely truthful. "You have no headache?"

Merry was silent.

"Then your headache remains?"

Merry knew he had to give an answer. "Only a little."

"Hmmm," Paladin bit his pipe, "You see, that's why it's three days and not one. It was only yesterday you left Bag End--and your breakfast in the hallway, and today you're suddenly better? How long have you rested today?"

Merry was again silent.

"I thought as much." Paladin replied. He stood up, "Let me see the wound."

Merry went over to his uncle and let him search through his hair above his right ear. It looked clean to Paladin; probably due to Merry's earlier swim. "It's all right for now, but I still mean for you to stay abed for the next day or so."

"Yes, sir." Was all Merry said.

"Lastly," Paladin said, "I want you to know I, too, am forever grateful; thank you for my daughter's rescue." Paladin put his arms around his nephew and hugged him tight. After a moment, he loosed Merry, and said, "I know you're angry at the moment, but I don't see any other way to get you to rest."

Still downcast, Merry said, "I'm am angry, but only with myself; now I shall miss three days of fresh air and walking about the meadows."

"You don't have to miss it, Merry!", Paladin grinned. "We will use tomorrow for your punishment day, as long as you stay in bed. If you do so, we will see about your 'walking about the meadows' on the third day." Then he cautioned the teen, "However, if you get out of bed for any reason other than nature, then all three days shall be punishment!"

The sparkle came back into Merry's eyes; he threw his arms around Paladin, "Thank you, Uncle!"

"Another last word; once you are up and walking about again, do not leave this area without telling your Auntie or Pearl, or myself even. Am I clear this time?"

"Yes, sir."

"Now to bed you go!"


	7. A Late Night Chat

Here's one more! Thanks to Fool of a Took, Prince Tyler Briefs, and Natta for your great reviews! Now back to work...

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Chapter Seven: A Late Night Chat 

After supper, Merry was back in his room lying in his bed with his hand wrapped behind his head as if studying the ceiling. There was a knock on the door, and before he could respond it opened up. Pippin stuck his head inside, "Are you all right?"

Merry looked at his cousin, "Am I all right?--what do you mean?"

"Didn't Papa swat you?" Pippin came over and sat on Merry's bed.

"No." Merry went back to studying the ceiling.

"He _didn't_?"

"No."

Merry's pluck just went up several notches in his young cousin's eyes. Then Pippin couldn't take the suspense any longer. "So tell me about it!"

"What's to tell about it?" Merry blinked at the ceiling, "It's all over with; I must stay in bed all day tomorrow and possibly the next. End of story."

Pippin was shocked, "You have to stay in bed tomorrow? All day?"

"Yes."

"Was that your punishment?"

"What?"

"I said, was that your punishment?", Pippin laughed, thinking Merry was trying to play around his questions.

"Yes!", Merry snapped.

Pippin watched as his friend studied the ceiling. "Is this one of those times where you don't want me around?"  


"Don't be ridiculous! I'm in thought, is all."

"Can I ask what you were thinking about?" Pippin ventured.

Merry let out a long breath, "My father." He continued to gaze up aimlessly; looking for nothing. "I can't get his words out of my head."

"What words?"

"Just certain things he said...", Merry trailed off. "I don't know if I should trust him--or his words."

Pippin knew his friend's heart was torn and wanted to help him in any way possible, so he decided to aid in asking a few questions. "Do you want them out of your head?", he said.

Merry looked at his young cousin on the bed next to him, "I don't know", was all he said.

"Do you know how you feel about your father?"

This query startled Merry more than anything he could have asked himself. "Pippin!" He said, "Where do you get these questions from?"

Pippin merely fixed his (somewhat) innocent green eyes on his cousin; listening for an answer.

Merry sighed and returned his gaze back to the ceiling. "That's the hardest answer I have yet to come up with.", he replied. "Uncle Paladin--your dad--he's always patting me on the shoulder, and he makes nothing out of hugging me." Merry paused. "He's my most favorite and beloved uncle, Pip! I can't count the times I've wished he were my dad as well...but I can't help asking myself if I will ever have anything like that with my own father."

"There's no reason why you can't! Don't match what you and my Papa have to what you and your own father could have--_or will have_ in the days to come!", Pippin answered. "That isn't fair to Uncle Saradoc!"

There was moment of silence as Merry thought on Pippin's point of view. He knew his young friend was correct; he then gazed at him and smiled, "What have you done to my cousin? I could've sworn I had an eight-year-old on my heels a minute ago!"

"He's safe in my pocket!" Pippin laughed.

Merry smiled, then grew serious again; "But do you suppose my own father is worth giving a second chance to?"

Without hesitation Pippin replied, "Yes!" Then he elaborated, "Merry, I will be the second hobbit in the Shire to admit he's been an ass to you; yet when you and I are asses to each other, do we not take that in stride and work through all that?"

"Yes, but that's what _friends _do, Pippin!" Merry said. "My dad is not my friend; he's my father! How do I work through _that_?"

Pippin hesitated this time, weighing his answer before he gave it. "Well....if he's not your father....then he could be your friend."

Merry cocked an eye and raised his infamous eyebrows, "How so?"

Now it was Pippin's turn to gaze at the ceiling, "Has he not missed everything a lad likes to do with his father?"

Still watching Pippin, "Yes, but what does that have to do with him as my....._friend_?" The word had a strange flavor on Merry's tongue.

Pippin sighed, "It seems to me that even though he's your father in title, it would be hard for him to be more than a friend to you...because he's not _earned _the title, if you get my meaning."

"So, what you're saying is that even though he's my father in name, he's not earned anything more than to be...._a friend_, as you say. Did I get that right?"

Pippin nodded, "Yes, and what's more--and you won't like what I'm about to say, but here goes! You should allow your father every chance to try and be your friend--because that's the only way he can ever get to know you now; you've already grown up and did all the things we lads like to do when we're little. You can't ever go back and do it all over again." Not sure if he conveyed his thoughts clearly, "Did that make sense?"

Merry was now ever so grateful he spoke to his friend. "Perfect sense, Pip! But now what happens?"  


This time Pippin sat up on his elbows to address his cousin, "For one, you really must try to be pleasant towards him!"

Merry rolled his eyes remembering how he spoke to his father while at Bag End, "He deserved it, Pip."

"Perhaps," Pippin said, "but that was _before _he was swayed of how much of your life he's missed, and will never see again! Hopefully he now knows better!" 

Merry noticed his cousin had become solemn. "What's the matter, Pippin?"

Pippin shrugged, and picking at the quilt threads he said, "I was just thinking about my Papa and me."

Merry was curious, "And?"

"I've seen other hobbits my age--that have no papa." Pippin answered. "Merry--I can't think of life without mine. Does that make me....spoiled?"

"No, Pippin, it doesn't." Merry explained, "It just shows that you're still young and you need your dad."

Thinking his cousin was evading his root question, Pippin asked more directly, "But do _you _think I am, Merry?"

"What..._spoiled_?" 

"Yes!" Pippin watched his cousin with wide eyes.

With all sincerity Merry said, "I think...," then he couldn't hold back grinning any longer. "I think you have another ten years before you have to worry about any of that!", he laughed. "Pippin, you're not even nine years old yet! Give yourself some time to grow up!" Then he added, "I don't see you as _spoiled_, but I do wonder about how....", Merry trailed off in his thoughts.

"Wonder about what?", Pippin asked.

Merry finished his thought, "I don't know...perhaps I worry over much about you having friends your own age."

"I know a few lads my age", Pippin replied, "I just choose not to spend my time with them."

"Why not?"

"Because I have you--and Frodo, and Sam, and Fredegar!"

Merry was trying to get to the heart of the matter; he felt Pippin wasn't telling everything. "What's wrong with Rory or Dody?"

After a slight pause, Pippin finally spoke, "Rory and Dody only like to play games. They don't like to talk about the Old Forest or dragons--it frightens them. They think Frodo and Bilbo are completely mad, and refuse to listen to any of Bilbo's tales." Merry nodded in understanding as his cousin continued, "I like to sit and listen to Bilbo tell about his wonderful adventures--and _Smaug_!" Pippin could see in his mind's eye a huge dragon soaring over Lake-Town as the townspeople tried to defend it. "I do like to play games _every now and then_--when I wish to be trampled by Sancho and his friends...", then Pippin added, "but I would much rather sit by the fireside with kindred spirits smoking a pipe and drinking a mug while talking about Elves and Dwarves! Though, I suppose I shouldn't make myself bothersome to you and Frodo."

"You're not bothersome, Pippin!", Merry said. "You're more than welcome to spend your time with our little group, and I know Frodo has taken a liking to you--but you didn't hear that from me!", laughed Merry. Then he added, "You're more likely to be silly, perhaps, or even a _loon_, but not bothersome!"

Pippin smiled, "Are you saying that my wits have left me, Merry?"

"Yes!" Merry smiled, "And speaking of _loons_--do you remember that song we made up at Lithe?" In spite of his growing weariness, Merry began to laugh at the mere thought of the silly poem.

Only too glad to change the subject, Pippin laughed along with his cousin, "I can still recall all the words!" He sat upon his knees on his cousin's bed and began to chant the words; Merry would join in as certain parts came to him:

****

"Frogs and snails

on lake and pond

meeting beneath the moon.

how do you do?

said the snail to the frog

but the frog was eaten by a loon.

my, oh my

but that was close!

said the snail as he crawled far away.

not so fast!

said the loon to the snail

as he followed right after his prey.

here I'll hide

beneath this rock

said the snail as the loon went by.

the loon did stop

and he laughed at the snail,

I will say that you did try!

(here Pippin hits the mattress with his good fist)

pound! went the beak

but the snail was gone--

gone in the blink of an eye!

the loon went mad

and he said to himself,

tonight I will have snail pie!

now I'm safe!

said the snail to himself

as he sped up the tree in haste.

the loon flew quicker

and the tree much thicker;

not a snail did he ever once taste!**"**

Both hobbits laughed so hard that they barely heard the knocking on the door. "Someone's knocking, Merry!", said Pippin.

Come in!", Merry's laughter trailed off.

"You lads ought to be sleeping by now! It's nearly midnight!", Paladin whispered. He was dressed in his own night shirt, yawning from ear to ear.

"I'm sorry Uncle, were we making too much noise?", asked Merry.

"Just a little. Though I much prefer be woke by laughter than by a child's cry!", Paladin sat down next to Merry. "How are you feeling?", he felt Merry's head; a little warm, but more than likely caused by his boisterous laughter.

"I'm all right, though I still have my headache. When do you suppose it will finally be gone?"

"You quickly forget, Merry--you've had a very busy day!" Then Paladin wrapped his arms around his nephew, "Goodnight, Merry!", and kissed his head. 

Then Paladin got up to take Pippin to his own bed, but Pippin was already fast asleep, snuggled next to his cousin. He was going to lift Pippin, then Merry whispered to Paladin, "It's all right, Uncle! He can sleep in my bed tonight--I think I wore him out with all my questions!"


	8. The Letter

I tweaked this at the end--Old Rory hasn't kicked the bucket just yet! :-P Silly me; I knew that!

****

Chapter Eight: The Letter

Pippin woke up the following morning a little confused. _I must have fallen asleep here,_ Pippin said to himself. He noticed Merry was gone. _Just like him--always wanting to be first at the table!_, he mused. He yawned and stretched out the sleep in his arm and legs, then he got up to freshen himself for breakfast. Pippin heard a noise and the door opened; in walked Merry with wet hair and wearing a large towel wrapped around him.

"Dahlia's making baths!" Pippin said.

Merry went to his wardrobe and began to grab a clean nightshirt to change into; this was the day to stay in bed. "You'd better hurry up otherwise you won't get any breakfast!"

Pippin dashed out of Merry's bedroom and down the hallway, into the kitchen and skidded to a stop at the sight of a closed door.

"You're too slow once again!" Pim laughed at her brother. She sat at the table eating breakfast with Pearl; both lasses had their wet hair tied behind their heads. "Pervinca is in there now."

Pippin sat at the table to await his turn at a bath. "I think you all plot against me!", he teased, "How is it that I'm always the last one?"

"Because that's the benefit of being older; we plot against the youngest! It's our lot in life!" Pim jested in return.

Pearl couldn't let Pim jab at her favorite (and _only_!) little brother any longer. "Truth be told, Pip, Mother woke up Merry first on purpose. You're going to need help with your bath.", she said indicating to his splinted and bandaged wrist.

"Oh", Pippin said. "Can I eat breakfast while waiting?"

"Why? Pervinca will be out in a few moments; _she's been in there for a while now!_", Pearl shouted the last part.

The door opened up and out walked a sopping Pervinca; herself wrapped in a large towel and dripping water all over the floor with her long, wet hair.

"Hurry up and get dressed, lass!" Pim said to her, "or we shall eat everything before you get back!"

Pervinca quickly exited, leaving Dahlia to set the bath water for her brother. Pippin looked around noticing his mother wasn't anywhere bustling about as she normally was. "Where's Momma?", he asked while nibbling on a piece of bacon.

"The Messenger arrived with letters, and well....you know mother!" Pearl craned her neck to see through the window, "That poor Messenger!", she uttered, "His ears must be worn down to nubs by now!"

Merry entered the kitchen wearing his overcoat over his nightshirt to ward of the morning chill and sat down, "Auntie is still out there?", he shook his head. "I wonder at what's so interesting to hold her audience for so long!"

"It doesn't take much, Merry!" Pim chuckled. "Mother needs to get to town more often!" Pim noticed her cousin's odd attire, "Why are you wearing a coat _at breakfast_?"

Just then, Dahlia peeked into the kitchen and spoke to Pippin, "Your bath is ready, lad!", and stood aside.

"Thank you, Dahlia!", Pippin shouted as he darted past the elder hobbit and into the puffs of steam coming from the wash room. Merry got up and followed after Pippin to assist him. 

After the door was shut, Dahlia laughed, "I've never met a laddie who likes baths as much as he does!" 

Eglantine opened the kitchen door holding a bundle of letters. She set the entire pile on the little table to the right as she came in except for one, and brought it to the breakfast table with her. Her expression was one that all mothers have when worrying about their children.

Pearl watched as her mother placed the letter in front of her to read. Pearl picked up the small parchment and began to read, "_Dear Paladin, I wish to visit with my son, Meriadoc. I shall arrive shortly before supper tonight; I trust this will not inconvenience you. Signed, Saradoc Brandybuck". Pearl looked up at her mother._ "Do you think Merry will want to see his father so soon?", she said as she passed the letter to her sister.

Eglantine shrugged, "He has not spoken to me at all about his father so I don't know how he feels. I rather hoped he had done so with his uncle, or at the very least with one of his cousins." She looked at both her daughters.

Pearl shook her head, "He has not spoken to me." Then she nudged her sister sitting beside her, "How about you, Pim?"

Unable to take her eyes from the script, Pim also shook her head. She replied, "No, but it shouldn't take much of a guess whom he _has _spoken to!" Then she looked up, "I only hope Merry is ready for all of this."

"Ready or not," Eglantine answered, "the forthcoming Master of Buckland will be our guest for supper this evening."


	9. Secret In The Wash Room

****

Chapter Nine: Secret in the Wash Room

Inside the wash room, Merry helped his cousin into the large bathtub, taking great care with his healing wrist. He had rewrapped Pippin's splint with clean bandages while he set the dirty ones aside for later washing.

"Where are you going?" Pippin demanded.

"To get fresh towels! Do you wish to drip dry until supper this evening?"

Pippin entertained himself trying to make the bar of soap float, "Of course not, but what about my cloth?"

Merry looked towards the stool next to the tub, "It's right there! If you were any closer it would bite your nose!"

"I know that!" Pippin replied, matter-of-factly, "But how am I supposed to soap it?"

Merry saw Pippin waving his bandaged arm in the air, "Oh. Well, I'm only going to be a moment!" 

A sparkle came to Pippin's eye, "All right, but I will help you along--I'll first get the cloth wet!" Pippin pounded the wash cloth into the water, splashing a wall of water towards Merry.

Merry recoiled as water soaked through the overcoat to his nightshirt; then he heard his cousin laughing at him from the tub. Merry shook the excess water from his hair, then moved towards Pippin.

Pippin's eyes got wide in anticipation of Merry's retribution and ducked under the water. 

"Pipp--!", then Merry could have sworn the room suddenly turned upside down. He caught himself just in time with all fours on the floor before he fell there...off balance.

Out of breath, Pippin came up sputtering from under water with his eyes shut tightly, "Give me a towel, Merry! I got soap in my eyes!"

Disoriented, Merry crawled in the direction where the towels were and grabbed one. He could hear Pippin sniffling; his nose apparently watering from his burning in eyes. Merry used the folding table to stand up and steady himself.

"Merry!! Hurry! My eyes are burning!"

Merry found if he walked slowly, he was able to keep the room in focus. He reached his cousin and wiped his eyes with the dry towel, then sat on the stool next to the tub.

"What's the matter with you, Merry?" Pippin was able to open his eyes now. "What took you so long?"

"I can't walk without the room spinning!" Merry answered.

Pippin noticed his cousin's look of anxiousness, "You can't walk at all? Why is that?"

"What did you say?"

Pippin repeated his question, "I said, why is it you can't walk?"

"I can walk, Pippin--I just get a little...off balance!" Merry said.

Pippin became concerned for Merry, "Shall I call for my mother or my sister?"

"No! I'll be all right later; whatever you do, don't tell anyone!"

"Why not?"

"Because your Dad will think that I am ill and then put another day onto my three days of bed rest!" , Merry answered.

Pippin studied his cousin, "This has happened before, hasn't it?"

"Hmmm?"

"What--are you hard of hearing now?" Pippin dramatically moved his mouth, "I SAID, this has happened before, HAS IT NOT?"

Merry shrugged, "Only after a swim; that's why I don't go swimming as much as I used to!" Then he playfully smacked Pippin's head, "and don't be cocky!" He grabbed the wash cloth and motioned for Pippin to hand him the cake of soap.

"I wouldn't have to be if you didn't keep your secrets to yourself!" Pippin scolded the older lad, "Does your being off-balance have something to do with your hearing?"

"It's not a _secret_, Pippin!", said Merry, working up a lather with the cloth. "The healer at Brandy Hall has told me that when I go for a swim, I can expect to be off balance for a day or so. It doesn't always happen, but when it does, I know it by the way everything sounds as if I'm still underwater."

"So," Pippin grinned as he took the soapy cloth from Merry, "every time you go swimming, I can expect to repeat nearly everything I say--did I get that right?"

"I don't mean to interrupt your being a _complete ass_, but could you sit still so I can wash your filthy head?"

"I already washed my head!", Pippin protested.

"I can see that! That's why I'm washing it again!"

Pippin thought more on his friend; "You will be fine later on?"

"Positively!", Merry replied, "So don't worry--and let's keep this to ourselves!"

Pippin didn't like this, but he knew how much Merry hated being cooped up indoors. "All right--but I won't lie to my Papa!"

"Don't!", Merry's overconfidence was building up again, "Because he won't be able to notice a thing!"


	10. Stealing Merry

Just want to say thanks to Natta, Fool-of-a-Took, Zebra Wallpaper--did I miss anyone?--for the great reviews! This has been a busy week at work, leaving me little time for things I like to do...

(Zebra--you caught on to it! It's all in innocence! I mentioned it back in Summer Holiday)

****

Chapter Ten: Stealing Merry

It was after elevensies when Eglantine finally met with her nephew. Merry sat in his bed and fidgeted. He knew something was about to happen--never before had his aunt asked to speak with him alone. _What sort of trouble am I in now?, _he wondered to himself. He watched intently as Eglantine sat down across from him, holding an envelope with a broken seal. Merry recognized it as the seal of his father. "Read this.", was all she said as she handed Merry the envelope.

Merry opened the envelope and took out the small folded parchment and read it. After a moment, he spoke, "Do you know if he intends to take me away?"

"I don't know, sweetie--I only know what you know," she said.

Merry curled up into a ball under his blankets with a far away expression on his face. Eglantine wanted to comfort him somehow yet felt it would only complicate the matters in his young head. She smoothed the hair away from his face, "It will all work out, child." _Wait!, _she thought, and nonchalantly caressed his forehead again. "How do you feel, Merry?"

"I have a headache, Auntie, and I'm not feeling quite well at the moment. May I please be alone?" The letter suddenly became a good alibi for not feeling good.

Eglantine wasn't fooled for a moment; she knew Merry's ailment was more than a mere headache. She rubbed his shoulder as she got up, "Very well, but I will have your uncle look in on you when he arrives, all right?"

"Yes, ma'am."

Paladin arrived home early that day and was met by his wife at the door. Pearl and Pim had been sent to tell him about the letter and the imminent visit by Saradoc that evening. He was deeply concerned over how his nephew was coping with the pending reunion--especially since he'd already told Merry his father wasn't coming to claim him for another three weeks. First, he decided to meet with his wife to discuss Took hospitality.

Eglantine followed Paladin into his study, and was taken by surprised as he swept the door shut behind them and held her close to kiss her. After a *long* moment he drew breath and said, "I've been waiting all day for that!"

She wrapped her arms around him and gazed into his hazel eyes, "Paladin Took! After twenty-eight years, you haven't changed a bit!" Then she pressed her lips against his.

As he held her he whispered in her ear, "You won't let me! You're still as beautiful as the day we met!"

As in any marriage with children, the sweetest of moments didn't last long. Paladin sighed, "How is Merry doing?"

"Not very well, I'm afraid.", said Eglantine as she settled in a chair next to her husband. "When I broke the news to him a few hours ago all he did was complain of a headache." Then she handed him the envelope, now looking a little worn from overused.

Paladin took a moment to read the script. "I can't believe him!" Paladin smoothed back his hair in disgust. "He said he'd wait a few weeks before he came after Merry. We talked about it before I left!"

"Then I wonder what happened to change his mind."

"That's what I would care to know!" Paladin studied on this. Then he looked at his soul mate--the only one he knew he could confide his deepest secret to, and not have it announced all over the Shire. "Tina...I don't know why, but..." then he trailed off and began again, "no, I _do _know why, but I don't know how to fight the reasoning behind it."

Eglantine saw the strange look on her husband's face. "What are you talking about?"

"Now that we have Merry under our roof, I.....I don't know if I can give him up so easily."

Eglantine was incredulous. "_Can't give him up? _Paladin, you _must_!", she nearly shouted. "I love him, too, but we can never be his parents! He belongs to his father--_and your sister_! He belongs to Buckland!"

Paladin winced at his wife's verbal lashing, "I wasn't saying to _steal _Merry; I meant that my heart tells me....he wants to stay here."

Eglantine tried to reason with him, "Well what else did you mean? If you plan to not 'give him up so easily', _then that is stealing him_, Paladin! Merry is not our child!"

"I knew you would say that."

"Well of course I'd say that! What else did you expect me to say?"

"I don't know--perhaps having a little more understanding would've been nice!"

"Paladin! What kind of parents would we be if we allowed Sara and Essie to steal our Pippin? Hmm? It would start the biggest feud in Shire history, I'll say!"

Paladin now felt embarrassed for his selfishness. "I'm sorry I brought it up!" 

"Good! Now let's drop it and leave it there! No more talk of not wanting to give up Merry!"

Eglantine then took her thoughts to matters more current, "I suppose Sara can sleep in Merry's room," Eglantine said, "and Merry can move in with Pippin for the duration of his father's visit."

"What about the guest room?"

"He can't sleep in the guestroom! I have a few boxes of mathoms stored in there that are cluttering it up."

"We can always 'un-clutter' it!", he replied.

"It wouldn't hurt two young lads to share a room for a day or two!"

Paladin's pride still stung from his wife's words. He got up and said, "Very well. I'm going to look in on the children, and see to Merry." 

Eglantine quietly watched her husband leave the room. She thought to herself, _Somehow, I get the feeling this won't be the end of this conversation!_


	11. Flesh and Blood

****

Chapter Eleven: Flesh And Blood

Paladin first went to Pearl's room where all three daughters were having tea and greeted each with a kiss on the cheek. "Hullo, father!", Pearl kissed her father in return, "I must say that it's nice to have you home so early, but...I know that it's not under the most desirable circumstances." Paladin truly appreciated his oldest daughter; not only did he consider her to be the most beautiful lass in the Shire, Pearl could always be depended on in a time of need, and say the kindest word to a troubled soul.

Pim was more a kindred spirit to his own; she wasn't afraid to get her hands dirty, and loved to help him out in the fields. Whenever he fell short of field hands to tend the crops, Pim was always there at his side, ready to assist. Paladin knew he was going to have to keep an eye out for her when suitors came her way.

"Father! Wait here a moment!", Pervinca jumped up and ran out of the room. She quickly returned holding a loop of flowers she had woven together to make a necklace. "Here, Father! I made it just for you!", said Pervinca as she beamed with pride. She stretched on the tips of her toes as her father bent down to receive the gift. 

Paladin surveyed his youngest daughter; yet another beauty for him to guard and protect from the schemes of unscrupulous lads. While pondering in his thoughts, he almost missed the hug she rendered when she placed the flower necklace on about his shoulders. He held her tightly and thought, how_ long will her innocence last? _ She only recently turned thirteen and begun the process of growing from a child to a young hobbit lass. Paladin wondered which of her many friends would be the one to make her heart jaded to life in general?

He eyed the group of lasses around the tea table. Each one, as beautiful as the gem or flower she was named for. _No_, he thought, _I would fight to the death over my flesh and blood! What was I thinking?_

"Thank you, Pervinca! I shall treasure this always!", and kissed his daughter's head.

He was on his way to Pippin's room when he passed by Merry's door first. His curiosity was eating at him; he wanted to know how his nephew was taking the news of his father's arrival. He knocked before he opened the door. The room was slightly dark inside as the drapes were closed, and once he stepped through the threshold he could feel the warmth emanating from the flames in the fireplace. The covers were laid aside on the bed, but no one was in it. He knew Merry wasn't answering a call from nature because he would have seen Merry leave his bedroom from Pearl's room down the hallway. Paladin sighed at the thought of his nephew disobeying him again--and so soon. 

Then he had an idea to check with Pippin. Those two had become inseparable lately. If anyone knew the mind-set of that teenager, it was his very own son. He walked over to the next bedroom door down, and knocked. He was relieved to hear the sound of Pippin on the other side of the door. "Come in!", he heard the child's voice. _Merry can't be far away if Pippin is still in his room!_ Paladin stepped inside, "Hullo, Pippin!" He watched as Pippin sprang to his feet and ran into his arms for a hug. "Papa!"

"Oof! Pippin! You're not the little laddie you used to be, are you?", he held Pippin in a tight hug. He drank in the scent of his only son--the scent that gave him the name to which everyone in the Shire knew him. As he held Pippin in arms, he squeezed him in a hug, rubbing his back, "Have you been in the cellar stealing apples again?" He could feel his son's head nodding in assent. When he looked to where Pippin was sitting, there were five apple cores all eaten down to the cartilage, seeds, and stem. For all of his appetite, Pippin was Paladin's heart and soul. Everyday he looked forward to spending time with his son when he came home from working in the fields.

"Do you know where Merry is, son?"

"He's in his room, Papa. I think he's sleeping."

Paladin shook his head, "I was just there; I didn't see him at all."

Pippin got worried. "But I just left him there not an hour ago!"

"Well come and have a look, Pippin, because he's not in his bed!" Paladin set his son down for him to follow.

Pippin trailed his father into his cousin's bedroom, and sure enough the bed was empty. Pippin knew Merry was determined to not disobey his Uncle today; so where would he go? Pippin walked around the other side of the bed to see if there were any clues as to his cousin's whereabouts. Paladin saw it the moment after Pippin did; in front of the fireplace, wrapped in a heavy quilt lay the sleeping form of Merry.

"Papa! He's trying to roast himself alive!"

"No son, I don't think that was his intent." Paladin knelt down and gently nudged his nephew. "Merry!! It's time to wake up, Merry!"

Merry stirred ever so slightly in his sleep then opened his eyes, "Uncle? I got cold, so I took a little nap next to the fire."

Paladin felt his nephew's head, "That wasn't a good idea, Merry--you're rather warm now--how are you feeling?"

"I'm feeling incredibly well today!", Merry perked up somewhat in spite of his drowsiness.

Paladin saw through his facade. "Pippin--go and tell your mother that we'll be needing the guestroom! She'll know what you speak of." 

Then he turned his attention to his nephew, "Well, Merry! That means tomorrow you can come with me to the fields to help with the harvest!", he said. Paladin feigned excitement at the prospect of Merry joining him, "I know how much you're fond of picking _tomatoes_! And I also expect you to put in a full day's work; climbing trees, loading wagons--and no small talking with the young lasses!" Paladin jested on the last part.

Merry was puzzled at his uncle's remark, "I don't care to pick potatoes, if you please, and there's no need to be calling me an ass!"

"I didn't call you an ass!" Paladin wondered at Merry, "I said young _lasses_! What did you think I said?" He took Merry under his arms to help him stand.

"Oh, nothing--the sleep must still be in my head!" Merry hoped his uncle wouldn't pursue the matter.

"Are you well enough for your father to visit?" Paladin asked.

"I believe I am. I've been expecting this." Merry was grateful when his uncle aided him to the bed so he wouldn't notice his lightheadedness. He also paid close attention to reading his uncle's lips as he spoke--this helped sometimes.

Paladin helped Merry to lay down, then tucked the blankets around him, "So...", he ventured, "have you been thinking about going back home--to Brandy Hall?"

"Oh, yes, but not this soon!", Merry answered, "Pip and I talked about it at length, and I decided to let my father get to know me--but to go back home? No--not yet."

__

"Merry," Paladin sat down next to his nephew, "I'd not be truthful with you if I said I was happy at the prospect of you going home." 


	12. The Arrival

****

Chapter Twelve: The Arrival

"He's here!!" Pervinca yelled. She was in the kitchen passing in front of the little window when she saw her uncle--_and aunt_! "Aunt Essie is here, too!" Pervinca was debating if she should haul the box of discarded items from the guest room out to the burn pile as the guests walked in, or if she should hide it in the wash room until later when it could be sent out discreetly. She opted for the latter and just in the nick of time; the bell rang as she made haste to shut the wash room door and pulled the scarf off her head. She patted the dust off of her dress and smoothed out the wrinkles, took a deep breath, and opened the door.

"Uncle Saradoc! Aunt Essie!", she smiled, "What a pleasant surprise!"

Saradoc eyed his young niece, "Did you not get our letter?"

"Umm...yes, Uncle, but we didn't know we'd have the pleasure of seeing Aunt Essie as well!", she quickly replied.

By this time, the rest of the family, minus Pearl and Merry, were in the kitchen greeting the guests.

"Ah, well, I do apologize for the change in plans; Essie dearly misses her son, and also wishes to see him."

Pippin replied, "Is he not your son as well?" _Out of the mouths of babes!_

The room went silent. Thinking quickly, Paladin spied Pearl's knitting bag on a chair nearby. He grabbed it and thrust it into his son's hands, "Pippin! Go take this to Pearl! She'll be needing it!"

Pippin took the bag, but hesitated, "But Papa! She's--"

"_Now_, Pippin!", and Paladin gave his young son a gentle shove down the hallway.

Paladin stepped forward and offered his hand to Saradoc, "I'm sorry, Sara! Pippin has a mind of his own!"

Saradoc took Paladin's hand and shook it, "He speaks the truth, Paladin; I wasn't careful of my words!"

Paladin gave Saradoc a firm pat on the shoulder, and led him away from the rest of the family, now chattering away and exchanging hugs. "It's good to see you, Sara, but tell me--why have you come so soon to claim Merry?"

Saradoc awkwardly looked about him, "Actually, I haven't come to claim him--_yet_. I've come to visit him--just as the letter stated." Then he added, "You said I got his attention at Bag End." Saradoc looked at his friend, "I want more than my son's attention, Paladin."

Outwardly, Paladin smiled and congratulated his sister's husband on his decision. Inwardly, though, his earlier conversation with his wife came to mind, and once again Paladin felt his heart troubled at the prospect of losing Merry.

"Well, before you visit him, you must know that he hasn't been feeling well; in fact, we just came from his room. He fell asleep in front of the fireplace and nearly succeeded in roasting himself. He says he still has a headache, though I thought it would've been gone by now."

Saradoc thought for a moment then looked at Paladin, "From his fall at Bag End?"

"So it would seem, but I think it's more from things on his mind." Paladin replied. "He's just a lad, yet he's making very grown up decisions about his life right now. We should be glad that a headache is _all _he has!"

By this time, Eglantine and Esmeralda were listening to their conversation. Esmeralda grew worried, "My son is ill?"

Eglantine took hold of Esmeralda's arm to lead her down the hallway, "Come, Essie! I'll take you to him."

As Esmeralda walked into her son's room, she saw Merry sitting up as Pearl helped him to drink more water. Seeing her aunt, Pearl quickly jumped up to surrender her seat on her cousin's bed. "Auntie!"

Merry looked over to where his cousin Pearl was gazing. "Mum!", he called and opened his arms out to her.

Esmeralda sat down and held her son in her arms wanting never to let go. Her tears fell freely down her cheeks as she whispered in his ear, "Oh, Merry! You have no idea how much I've missed you!" She sat next to her nearly grown baby and rocked him.

Eglantine shepherded her brood outside the bedroom so that Esmeralda and Merry could have a private moment.

Merry was also in tears, "I'm so sorry, Mum!"

Esmeralda hugged her son tight for a long while until she finally held his face in front of her own, feeling his feverish cheeks in her hands. She took out her handkerchief and wiped his tears away, "Gracious me, child, what in the Shire do you have to be sorry for?" 

Merry sat back onto his pillows wiping his eyes with his hand, "Well, I've went and got myself into this fix, and I don't know how to get myself out now."

Esmeralda stroked Merry's damp curls away from his face. "Shhhh! You didn't get yourself into any sort of "fix"; your father got himself there!" Then she smiled, "I've done something I should have done long ago! I've dragged him out of his study, stole away the key, and forced him to take a look at his family; and most importantly, his son. For now, I want you to think about getting well!" She poured more water into the mug and put it up to Merry's lips, "Now I want you to drink up on water now; it will cool you and help rid you of your fever." She watched as Merry sat up and sipped more of the mug. 

Having drank nearly half of the mug, Merry sat back again to relax and wiped his mouth, "I'm glad you're here, Mum."

"Your father thought to visit all by himself, but wild horses couldn't have kept me away!" Their small talk was momentarily interrupted when Pervinca knocked on the door and opened it. Pim walked in carrying a huge tray with supper for two. Having put aside the water pitcher, Pervinca helped her sister set up the little table.

"Do you think you can stand up, Merry?" Esmeralda asked.

"I think so, Mum." Merry swung his legs down and was able to stand up holding onto his mother's shoulder, but had difficulty letting go of the bed with the other hand; the room would still spin a bit.

"Let go, son! I can bear you!" Merry wasn't too sure, though....

Pim and Pervinca stood to the side watching the whole scene. Finally Pim went to the other side of her cousin, "Hold on to my shoulder as well, Merry!" Pim brought Merry's arm around her shoulder, and she supported his waist. Between his mother and Pim, Merry walked to the tiny supper table in his room.

"Another picnic indoors!", he said as he sat down.

"Yes--but I'm afraid your window won't be open like before!" Pervinca said. This time, it was she who helped Merry into his chair. Pervinca then lingered over her cousin, paying special attention to adjusting his plate, cup, and fork. 

"Come on, Pervinca!", Pim took her little sister by the arm, "Let Merry and Auntie eat in peace!"


	13. Paladin's Struggle

****

Chapter Thirteen: Paladin's Struggle

It was after supper in Paladin's Study that the two adult hobbits met. Paladin sat down in the chair across from Saradoc, who was puffing away at lighting his pipe. The warmth from the fireplace set a comfortable tone to the room as Paladin settled himself in for a long and difficult conversation.

Having lit his pipe, Saradoc exhaled a long tendril of smoke. "So, Paladin, how goes the harvest?"

Puffing on his own pipe, "It goes well.", Paladin answered. "Most of the crops have been sold, or are being sold at the market. I just sent two wagon loads of grapes and a third laden with various other crops your way to Brandy Hall."

"Wonderful! I can already taste the excellent wine that your vineyard produces!" Saradoc grinned, "I've brought some of my best stock for you to taste!"

At this Paladin raised his eyebrows. "Have you?"

Saradoc got up and laid down his pipe. "Half a moment!", he said, then disappeared. He soon returned with a small wooden box that easily opened using a latch. Packed within a bit of straw laid a bottle filled with a dark liquid and sealed with a cork.

Paladin went over to his desk and found two small glasses inside a drawer and took them over to Saradoc, who filled them half full. Both hobbits waved the glasses under their noses and breathed in the bouquet.

Paladin closed his eyes as he swished the wine around in his mouth, and then swallowed. "Fine wine indeed!", he smiled. "How old was this bottle?"

Saradoc opened his eyes, "Let's see", he turned the bottle around to read the label, "I believe this bottle was laid from your very first harvest!"

"Let me see that!" Paladin took the bottle from Saradoc and read the label. "_1374_...indeed it is!" Paladin looked incredulous at his brother-in-law. "You've kept it all this time? Why?"

"To celebrate a most splendid occasion."

"And what _splendid _occasion would that be, may I ask?" Paladin didn't know what to think; he could only guess that Saradoc wanted to impress him for one reason....Merry. Paladin remembered various circumstances throughout their friendship when Saradoc resorted to such tactics, and the sharing of fine wine was without a doubt one of his methods. _How much will this wine cost me?, _he wondered. _Certainly this bottle of wine is not the price of his son!_

"The occasion of making a new beginning with my son!" Saradoc said, and drained his glass.

"A new beginning?"

"Yes! And I am willing to do whatever it takes to earn my child's trust once more--to make a fresh start." Saradoc watched Paladin's expression. "I thought you would be happy...if not for me, then at least for Merry."

Paladin's legs grew weak and sat down in his chair. "I am."

Saradoc sat down as well. He searched Paladin's face for anything resembling approval. "But your face betrays you." He let out a deep breath, "I should have been better prepared for this."

Paladin looked at Saradoc, "Prepared for what?"

"For, um....how should I say this?" Saradoc spoke with sincerity, "I was prepared for Merry to be attached to you; you have been the one at his side all these years--I was not. But I was not prepared for you, Paladin, to be attached...so deeply...to my own son."

"And should I not have been?" The fire was growing warm inside Paladin; and it wasn't emanating from the fireplace! "Are you saying it was all right for me to wipe the dirt and blood from his scraped knees, or to let him cry his heart out on my shoulder, but I wasn't allowed to love him?"

"No, Paladin, that isn't what I meant at all! You've taken it all wrong!" Saradoc tried to calm him, "I meant---"

"I know what you meant!" Paladin got up from his chair and stormed out of the study, slamming the door shut behind him. The ladies watched him in silence as he walked through the kitchen and out the door.


	14. Pippin's View

****

Chapter Fourteen: Pippin's View

Pippin stood with his ear pressed to his bedroom door. He could make out raised voices just before he heard the door slam. He couldn't make out the exact words, but he knew right away that one of the two grown male hobbits was angry.

Silently he turned the handle and eased the door open just a crack. He tried to take in the view of the hallway, but it was too long. It _seemed _empty. He eyeballed the other side of the hallway through to crack to make certain no one else was lingering about. Pippin opened the door further and slipped out of his room.

Taking great care so as not to make a sound, he crept up towards his father's study on his hand and knees. The door was still open a little, and Pippin could see his uncle sitting in a chair with his head in his hands. Thinking his uncle's attention was elsewhere, Pippin stretched his neck to scope the entire study. He could see his father no where inside the room.

__

Papa's the one who's upset!, he thought, and started to back away from the door.

"Laddie!"

Pippin flinched to hear his uncle call to him. He thought to make up a story to tell his uncle so that he could get away and look for his own father. But no; he caught sight of Saradoc's face. He could readily see his uncle had been in tears.

Now that he'd been found out, Pippin got up onto his feet. "I...I was looking for my Papa."

"Of course you were--come here, child."

Pippin hesitated, but obeyed his elder as his father taught him. He went over and stood in front of Saradoc. "Yes, Uncle?" Pippin took notice how Saradoc's face looked weary and flushed from his tears.

Still holding up his head with one hand, Saradoc looked at Pippin and spoke with a tired voice, "If I ask you a question, lad, I know you will answer me with the truth, will you not?"

Pippin thought a moment--_Uncle Saradoc asking me a question? What did I do this time? But no! I haven't been into mischief all day--so far!_ He nodded to his uncle.

Saradoc took a handkerchief from the inside pocket of his vest and wiped his nose with it. He deliberated for a moment, then asked, "Does Merry hate me? Does he hate me to the point of never wanting to come home--home to Brandy Hall?"

Saradoc looked at the young child in front of him. He envisioned his own son at that age; he knew only too well that he had hid behind his study for far too long. He remembered Merry at age eight, but could not recall any laughter, or any other intimate moments between him and his son. Even when it was time for his son to learn his letters he employed his brother, Merimac, using the excuse that Merry would learn quicker alongside his cousin Berilac. Then he smiled, remembering the scraps Merry and Berilac would get into. Tearing himself away from his reverie, he focused on Pippin's response.

"....he's thought a lot about you since then. I don't believe--"

"I'm terribly sorry, lad! Could you start over, please?"

"Yes, sir." Inwardly, Pippin felt a bit put out; _I'll have to remember to tell Merry his loss of hearing didn't come from swimming! _ "I said, _Not anymore_. Ever since you visited him at Bag End he's thought a lot about you since then. I don't believe he hates you, though I'm quite certain he is still angry."

Saradoc pointed a finger at himself, "With me?" Pippin nodded. Saradoc was silent for a few seconds, "Have you and Merry discussed his feelings at all?"

"Yes, sir, just last night we did." Pippin replied.

"And how does Merry feel about coming home?"

Pippin opened his mouth, then thought better and closed it again.

"Do you think there's any chance at all for me? I mean, do you think he'll ever allow me inside his heart?"

Never one to chase around bushes, Pippin got straight to the point, "Why are you asking _me _these questions? I can't answer them for Merry--I _could_, but I won't. Wouldn't you want to put these questions to your own son? He's in his room with Aunt Essie."

"Your answer does not cheer the heart of an old hobbit, laddie! But I thank you for being honest with me." Saradoc took in a deep breath, "Very well, Peregrin--I will do just as you said--and thank you!"


	15. A New Beginning

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Chapter Fifteen: A New Beginning

Esmeralda sat and watched her precious son sleep. She did this as often as she could since he was born. Soon enough life would turn him into an adult hobbit, and then....his wife would be the one to sit and watch him sleep.

Merry looked so peaceful as the flickering light from the fire danced upon his face; his eyes were closed and his countenance relaxed. She was content to just sit and watch him breath. 

Earlier, once supper was finished, she helped her son back into the bed. They spoke of different things, then Merry told his mother about rescuing Pervinca from the stream the day before. 

"Is that why you're having a hard time standing? Are your ears giving you grief now?" She watched Merry nod, "Only a little."

"Laddie! What am I going to do with you?" His mother pretended to be dramatically annoyed, which got Merry laughing. "You've been told about your ears before!" Then Esmeralda smiled, "But I didn't raise you to sit and be idle in such a situation; and I wouldn't have you any other way!"

After several minutes more of conversation she could see her son was becoming drowsy. At first he laughed about it, then as time wore on he found he simply couldn't keep his eyes open any longer. It was over an hour ago the last time he closed his eyes.

Esmeralda heard a soft knock upon the door and saw it open up a little as the lamp light from the hallway poured inside the dimly lit bedroom. She recognized the face that appeared around the door as her husband's. "Sara!", she whispered, "What is it that you want?"

Saradoc took his eyes from his sleeping son to his wife, "I only wanted to talk...to Merry." He closed the door behind him.

"Well, Dear, as you can see he's fast asleep. Go on to bed!" Her whisper barely left her lips when she felt his hands on her shoulders, gently massaging them. Esmeralda reached her hand up and touched his.

Saradoc bent down to whisper in Esmeralda's ear, "Then may I speak with _you_?"

Merry stirred in his sleep; shifting position, he turned over and faced his parents.

"Shhhh, Sara! We must go elsewhere and talk or we'll wake up Merry!"

"I'm already awake." Merry's eyes were open, though his voice was heavy with sleep.

"I'm sorry, Merry! It's my fault; I should have been more careful." replied Saradoc. "Shall I come back another time?" 

Merry shrugged his shoulders. "Then may I stay?" he ventured.

Merry shrugged his shoulders again, "Don't matter."

"Don't pester the lad, Sara!" Esmeralda leaned over to feel her son's forehead. "Does your head still hurt?"

Merry paused, "I don't think so."

"How about your ears?"  


"No, I don't feel anything." Merry was still groggy.

"Well, you don't feel too warm anymore, but your hair is damp." Then his mother reached under the blanket to feel his nightshirt. "Your fever must have broken--you're soaked!"

Esmeralda indicated across the room, "Go to the wardrobe there, Sara, and fetch Merry another nightshirt, and bring fresh linen as well!"

"Come along, son, get up _slowly _now! Don't want you to catch a draft in your wet clothes!" Esmeralda helped Merry get up and stand to the side while she took off the wet linen from the bed. Saradoc helped Merry into his dry nightshirt while Esmeralda left to finding additional bed sheets in the washroom. 

Esmeralda was back in a few minutes with a bundle of linen in her arms and proceeded to redress the bed. She pretended not to mind the conversation going on behind her.

"...I know you're angry with me, and...I guess I'm angry with myself, these days, too. I've felt a lot of anger over the years myself, and none of it was towards you. Yet you took the brunt of it. I can never forgive myself."

Merry did not respond right away. Esmeralda folded the sheet in half to place over the spot where he lay sweating. She let her eyes wander over to her son to ensure he wasn't about to emotionally explode.

Merry sighed, "I don't know if I even feel angry anymore. I don't know what I feel right now." His fixed his blue eyes on the little pillow that lay on a chair next to the fireplace. It had been sitting right where he left it before leaving for Frodo's party.

In his own mind, Saradoc was elated; this was the first real conversation that he and his son had had since Merry was a small lad. He almost didn't want to break the spell...

Saradoc watched as Merry curled up in his chair looking spent. He thought Merry was actually sleeping until he took his hand and brushed his longish hair away from his eyes. Saradoc didn't want to take the risk of ruining further chance of more talks with his son. "Well I am guessing a weighty conversation is not what you want at the moment. I will wait until you are feeling better, and hopefully then we may continue it?" Saradoc watched Merry for a response.

__

Why doesn't he just go away?, Merry heard his thoughts, _but do I really want him to? _ He felt himself take a deep breath and release it. _I suppose I've been wanting this...I may as well push forward._ Before he knew it, he found himself nodding his head.


	16. Good Company at the Oak Leaf Inn

****

Chapter Sixteen: Good Company at the Oak Leaf Inn

Paladin felt every jostling the pony rendered underneath him. Yet the sound of the rhythmic pace calmed the fury in his head. The cloud of unreasoning was lifting in his thoughts, and Paladin began the painful process of...letting Merry go. The thoughts in his head would echo, _You've gone and got yourself into this mess! You should never have taken that child under your roof!_ Then his heart would call out, _Where would the boy be if I hadn't? Running wild in the Shire woods no doubt, or falling into the wrong crowd of that Sandyman's son. _He shivered in his thoughts, _No, I couldn't let that happen with my sister's flesh and blood! Do I regret all the love and kindness I've given over to Merry? _Paladin hesitated not one second, _No. Never once._

Paladin saw he was approaching Tuckborough; one of the larger towns in Tookland. In the distance he could make out the lanterns that lit the entrance to the Oak Leaf Inn. He recognized the painted oak leaf that hung under the eaves, and the golden shadow of a large oak tree that stood nearby on the far side of the inn. 

Paladin knew his cousin Adelard frequented the tavern, as did a certain brother-in-law, Gilbold Boffin, more commonly known as Gillie. It wasn't drink Paladin sought at the tavern--he wanted someone to talk to; someone to help him reason with himself, and Addie was just the one to seek out. However, if Gillie was there, then Paladin could count on being the talk of Tuckborough for weeks to come.

Paladin rode up to the inn and dismounted, tying Fergie up to the hitching post. When he opened the tavern door he immediately felt the warmth of multiple friendships in discussion pour out. He knew most of the regulars, but there were a few patrons that he guessed were probably transients staying in the Inn. He scanned the tables to find his cousin.

"Ho there, Mr. Paladin!" Paladin turned his head toward the voice, and saw that it was old Orry Grubb. Paladin greeted his elder with a nod. "Good evening, Mr. Orry! Nice to see you're still up and about in Tookland!"

"Aye, laddie, I am!" The hobbit laughed and raised his mug in a salute, "And what brings ye to the Oak Leaf?"

Paladin had to nearly shout in the old hobbit's ears to hear his own voice above the din. "I'm looking for Addie--have you seen him?"

Orry pointed with his mug to a large round table nearest to the kitchen. "Over there, lad!"

Paladin smiled to himself as he imagined his own graying hair; _I guess when I'm Old Orry's age, every male hobbit will be a lad to me as well!_ He made his way around and in-between other tables and found Adelard laughing and jesting with his friends over a few mugs of ale.

"Paladin!" Adelard got up and took Paladin into a friendly, albeit drunken, bear hug. "I'm so glad you're here!"

"Why?"

Adelard paused, momentarily baffled, then shouted, "I don't know why! I'm just glad is all!" Everyone laughed.

"Sit! Sit!" Adelard grabbed an unused chair from the next table and gave it to Paladin. Then he shouted over the room, "Hollin! An ale for my cousin!"

Paladin reached inside his coat for his pipe, and then he remembered he left it back in study. Adelard intuitively knew his friend. "Half a moment!" He said, then patted down his vest pockets. "Ah! Here it is!" He pulled out a small traveling pipe he used when he couldn't find his usual one.

Paladin nodded his thanks as his cousin tossed him a pouch of leaf. "Fill up, now! I've got all night!" He laughed. "No Miss'es to go home to!"

Paladin's heart went out to his cousin; his wife had died after giving birth to their youngest son, Everard, and hadn't married again since. Adelard had dutifully raised his brood single-handedly, although with a bit of help from Eglantine when it came to the lasses.

Hollin came over to their table and slid the mug of ale over to Paladin--not spilling an ounce of it's contents! Paladin first took a swig of ale to wet his dry throat then asked, "When are you coming over for supper?" He didn't want to get too deep right away--especially with all the prying ears still present.

Before Adelard could answer him, Gillie walked up to the table, "Hullo, good friends and neighbors!" Paladin looked up and saw the cheery face of his older sister's husband. Then noticing Paladin, he added, "And hullo to you, too, Paladin!" Not waiting for an invitation, Gilllie found a chair and swung it backwards up to the table to straddle it, leaning on the back.

Paladin ignored his loud brother-in-law and took his attention back to Adelard, waiting for an answer to his question.

Adelard laughed. "I promise you next week--Trewsday! Honest this time!" 

Paladin smirked, "You said that last week!"

"Yes, well, I happen to know you've got your young Buckland visitor there these days." He noticed the smile leave Paladin's face. "Did I say something wrong?"

Paladin sighed and cleared his throat. "No." He took another sip from his mug.

Adelard eyed around the table, "Let's take a walk and get some fresh air."


	17. If You Love Something

There is a poem that goes something like, "If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it's yours. If it doesn't, it never was." I have loved this poem since I first heard it, but have no idea who it belongs to in order to give proper credit, but I can tell you, it's not mine.

****

Chapter Seventeen: If You Love Something, Let It Go...

Adelard and Paladin walked the outskirts of the town looking for a secluded area so they could speak freely. While they searched, they idly talked of everyday Shire happenings.

Paladin puffed on the loaned pipe as he shuffled along the path with his cousin, "Yes, Pimpernel will become a tween this coming year. Addie, they're growing up so fast!"

"I can see that!" Adelard agreed. "It seems like only yesterday we were hoping beyond hope that your baby boy would survive his first week and then his first month...and now how old is he? Nine?"

"Not quite...he's a very precocious eight-year-old!"

Adelard grinned at his friend. "I daresay that if your lad weren't so hard on Tina, you'd find an excuse to have another five children!" Both hobbits laughed at the notion.

"You know what, Addie? You're probably right--someone has to keep up with The Old Took!"

"Ah! Over there!" Adelard nodded in the direction of the blacksmith's tool shed. Paladin could barely make out in the dark the silhouette of a large rock and a small barrel next to the shed.

The two friends sat down, grunting their weary bones' displeasure. "All right, Paladain!" Adelard let out a long sigh, "Out with it!"

Paladin rested his head against the shed. "The question is....where do I start?"

"Try the beginning!"

Before starting, Paladin made Adelard promise not to tell a soul, but he was only going through the motions. He knew he could trust Adelard. When he was finished, he saw Adelard's brow furrowed.

"I don't know why I continue to feel hostile towards Sara. Maybe I do, but....perhaps it's...jealousness. Do you think?"

Adelard looked at his cousin, "You _do _have yourself in a pickle, Paladin! I could have told you this would happen. But do I blame you? No. I must say that what you did was beyond the call of any father. Yet when you opened your heart to Merry, you unwarily opened it to the pain of letting him go." He reached over and patted Paladin's hand, seeing his tears glistening in the moonlight. "And I know you feel this pain deeply."

"I just don't want to see Merry hurt again."

"I know that, Paladin, but the lad will be fine! He needs to find his way to his own father; if you don't let him, you'll only be seen as standing in his way." Adelard's expression became far away, "Before Niola died, when she knew Everard would be fine and as she lay in my arms, I cried and told her I didn't want to let her go. She told me something that I remember to this day. I can barely recall anything else she said, but I remember this; she told me that if I love something, I should let it go. And if that something loved me back, then it would return to me." Then he added, "If Niola never returns to me, then I shall go to her." He again reached over again to Paladin's hand and held it, "Let him go!"

Paladin sniffed and wiped his eyes with his handkerchief. "I never imagined it would be this difficult!"

"Difficult enough, yes, but what a road Sara will have to tread!" Adelard shook his head. "I never for one moment thought--"

  
"Thought what?"

Both Paladin and Adelard jumped to their feet, peering into the darkness to find...._Gillie_!

Adelard was quicker than his younger cousin was. He none too gently shoved Gillie up against the side of the tool shed, and was immediately sorry he did so; Gillie was extremely drunk. "What have you heard!" Adelard watched as Gillie sat on the stone in a heap then gather himself up for another onslaught.

"I heard enough!" Gillie staggered to his feet eyeing the barrel he just sat on, "The two of you slinking off into the dark so you could keep the barrel of ale all to yourselves!" Both hobbits winced at Gillie's breath.

Paladin wasn't convinced of his brother-in-law. "What else have you heard?"

"I heard enough!" Gillie was angry in his drunken haze, "I heard you (he pointed his finger into Paladin's chest) say that you didn't know Sara's road would be difficult! Then I heard _you _say--" But Gillie never finished his sentence; as he turned toward Adelard, he fell unconscious into his arms.

"Well, perhaps we have nothing to worry about!" said Adelard.

Paladin helped his cousin with Gillie, "No, but if I know my sister, Opal, like I do, _he _will have something to worry about when she sees him like this!"


	18. Healing Hearts and Broken Asses

Thanks to everyone for your reviews--trust me, there _is _an end to this story! I'll find it somewhere! There is light at the end of the tunnel (no pun intended)!

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Chapter Eighteen: Healing Hearts and Broken Asses

"Come on, Fergie! Get me home safe, and I'll feed you all the barley you want in the morning!" Paladin looked above him at the treetops. He could see the moonlight flickering through the leaves overhead; it was the only light he had to guide him and Fergie in the darkness besides the lantern his cousin gave him before he left the Oak Leaf. He had forgotten to bring these small, but necessary items with him in his angry haste earlier. Paladin politely declined Adelard's offer of a bed for the night; he now sensed an urgency to get home as quick as possible. He needed to speak with Saradoc...and then with Merry.

Fergie had traveled this trail on many occasions, so Paladin felt confident his pony would get him home, however, Fergie had never traveled this path after nightfall. 

His thoughts went ahead of him to when he'd arrive at home; what kind of greeting would he receive from his wife? _Will she be angry with me for behaving as a child and running off? What about Saradoc? He must think me a silly old fool of a Took!_ With every jostle towards home, Paladin could feel his heart sink into the same horizon with the moon.

It wasn't long after that Paladin was rewarded with the welcoming sight of home, and he quickly noted light was still showing through certain windows. As he dismounted and put Fergie up in the barn, he tried to summon up all the courage in his bones to face his sister and Saradoc. He threw a blanket over the pony's back and petted her muzzle, "Thanks, Fergie!", then fed her an apple for her efforts.

He opened the door and nearly flew through the kitchen when he heard a familiar voice. "_Paladin Took_!"

If he didn't know better, he would have swore it was his mother calling him! He hadn't heard his name called like that since....well, since he was a tween! It made him stop in his tracks!

"Tina! I must talk with Sara!"

Eglantine glowered at her husband. "Where have you been?"

Paladin, a bit winded from his hurriedness, held her face in his hands, "Tina--I really must speak with Sara..._now_! Then you and I can sit and talk all you want." Their eyes locked, "Please?" Eglantine saw the earnest pleading in his eyes that impelled her to nod in assent. 

"Thank you!" He said, and kissed her before hastening off to find his brother-in-law.

The first place he looked for Saradoc was the last place he saw him: in the study. Paladin almost didn't see him sitting in a far corner until he spotted a plume of smoke rings float up towards the ceiling.

Paladin entered inside the room, but Saradoc seemingly took no notice of him. As Paladin drew nearer, Saradoc blew another smoke ring and tossed a small, balled up wad of paper into the circlet. "I've fouled thingss up terribly, haven't I?"

Paladin took another chair from nearby and placed it alongside his friend. "Yes, Sara, you have." Saradoc looked at him. Then he said further, "and so have I." Then Paladin eyed the empty wine bottle that lay on the floor next to Saradoc's chair. _Good grief! Not another one to carry to bed!_

"My son is sisssteen years old, Paladin--and today was the firsss time I've had a decent converss....converss....conversssishun......with him." Saradoc cackled. "Wha' do you think of that?"

"Sara...." Paladin tried to calm him. "Sara, I was wrong to run out on you earlier. I apologize."

"Apologissse? For what? I'm a _Troll's asss_, asss my son will attesss to!"

"Merry doesn't think you're an--" Paladin stopped short. _Why am I lying? Merry _does _think he's an ass!_

"You sssee!" Saradoc stood up and waved an accusatory finger at his friend. "Even you think I'm an asss!"

"I don't--" Paladin stopped himself again. He snagged the waving finger that Saradoc was flying under his nose. "All right!" He nearly shouted, "So I think you're behaving like an ass, and so does Merry! But it didn't have to be that way! You did it to yourself!"

Saradoc was silent. "Then there iss no sstarting over, is there?", he said.

Paladin sat down in the chair across from Saradoc with his head in his hands, trying to calm the angry thoughts racing through his mind. "There _is _a 'starting over', Sara, but it will be a hard road. For you, for me, and for Merry. And Merry doesn't deserve this...this..._uncertainty_!"

Saradoc sat back down in his chair. He almost seemed to sober up right before Paladin. He stared at the intricate designs in the rug as he tried to sort out his own thoughts. Finally, after a few minutes, he spoke up, "I know thiss will be a 'hard road' as you ssay...for all of us...and yet I mean to follow it all the dayss of my life if I have to. If Merry tossses me out on my ear, then so be it. He will tosss me out on my ear everyday because I intend to knock on his door everyday--hoping that someday he will let me inside. And if he never does, then that is my juss reward." He wiped tears from his eyes. "And right now, all I know, Paladin, is that I need help...I need a friend. I know I've been as good a friend to you as I've been a father to Merry, but if...." Saradoc's voice became broken as the tears surfaced. "if you...can forgive..."

Paladin imagined he saw a part of Saradoc he knew before Merry was born. He reached his arms around the hobbit and embraced him. "I forgive you, old friend. Welcome back!" Paladin held his friend until he stopped crying.

"I'm still an asss, aren't I?"

Paladin sensed Saradoc was in no condition to talk about anything serious, let alone his son. "Sara, let us talk more in the morning, all right?"

"But don't forget you're dealing with an asss!" Saradoc sniffed as he stood up. "Everyone knows you can't deal with an asss!"

"Sara, let me help you to your room!"

Saradoc was still going on and on about asses when Paladin led him into the guestroom. "Shhhh, Sara! It's past midnight! You'll wake up the children!"

"Shhhh!"

Once Paladin had swung open the door, Saradoc staggered forward into the darkness of the room. He watched helplessly as his brother-in-law pitched forward, then sent a crashing noise down the hallway. 

Paladin rushed forward to find Saradoc lying on the floor cackling about what an ass he was for tripping. "Sara! I'm so sorry! We must have left a few things out when we cleaned up earlier!" Paladin was kicking himself for once again not bringing a lantern with him, though he couldn't very well hold both a lamp and Saradoc simultaneously. 

He helped Saradoc onto the bed and covered him with a thin blanket. No sooner had Paladin put the blanket over him that Saradoc was out for the count.


	19. Letting Go

****

Chapter Nineteen: Letting Go

Paladin softly knocked on the door to his nephew's room. He remembered seeing light inside the window as he rode up the lane earlier. He could hear a muffled voice on the other side of the door and decided the best course of action was to open the door and look inside.

He saw the source of the light was the fire in the fireplace, along with a lamp sitting on the table by the window. As he quietly closed the door behind him he recognized the voice of his sister, Essie, humming a lullaby from the chair where she sat--apparently half asleep herself. Nearby on the bed, lay a slumbering Merry covered with his favorite quilt. Paladin noted how serene he looked. Gone were the dark circles under his eyes and color had come back into his face.

Not wanting to break the enchanting spell that bound mother and son, Paladin crept to the wardrobe and pulled out a smaller, lighter blanket, and spread it over his sister.

Esmeralda startled and opened her eyes. "Paladin!" She whispered, "Where have you been? We've all been worried about you!"

"I'd tell you, but I promised a certain lady that I'd tell her first..." he whispered back. "How's Merry doing?"

This question brought a smile to Esmerala's lips, which Paladin interpreted as good news. "He's doing much better; his fever and headache gone, and his ears are cleared up."

"He was having problems with his ears?" Paladin crouched down to eye level with his sister.

Esmeralda yawned. Covering her mouth she nodded her assent.

"Essie, I'm sorry--I didn't know! He never said anything!"

"And he won't. He's too embarrassed of it." Seeing the dismay in her brother's face she further explained. "He's had it before. He gets it from swimming; he told me about Pervinca's swim in the stream. How is she doing?"

"Far better than her cousin!" He smiled. "You have a very grateful brother--and niece at your service!"

Esmeralda smiled at her brother, "And you have a very grateful sister at yours!"

"What do you mean?" Paladin was puzzled.

"All the love you and your family have given to my son over the years....I wouldn't know where to begin to repay you!"

"There was never any payment required!" Paladin was almost hurt that his sister would think he would ever ask for something in return for doing what he considered one of the easiest things in the world: simply being a father. It didn't matter to him that one of his "children", albeit part-time, was actually his nephew.

"I know that, and that's what makes it so hard to ask you this." She paused in her words.

"You want me to step back and let Sara get to know Merry--is that it?"

"No! Never to 'step back'! That would tear Merry's heart to pieces! He loves you so!"

"Then what would you have me do, Essie?"

"Well, if you would...I'd like for you to encourage Merry to allow Sara to get to know him. Hopefully one day he will be as close to him as he is to you right now."

Paladin thought on this for a moment. _If you love something, let it go... _

Esmeralda thought she saw a twinge of pain in her brother's eyes. She was surprised to hear his next words.

Paladin looked resolutely at Essie, his dearest sister, "I love Merry as I do my own son, and because I love him, I will do as you ask. Every boy needs to know his own father." Paladin replied. "But may I ask one thing?"

"What is that?"

"That Merry be allowed to continue his holiday visits here during the summers."

"Only on one condition."

Paladin wondered at his sister's request. "What would that be?"

"That Pippin be allowed to do the same!" She smiled. "He's old enough to spend time away from his mother and father, is he not?"

"Essie! You don't know what you ask!" Paladin grinned, "Pippin would be only too happy to get away from his ever-meddlesome parents; we sort of get in the way of his schemes and antics! He's a bright lad who knows his way around adults and can be a bit of a challenge at times!"

Esmeralda smiled back, "I know that! That's what makes Pippin so lovable; he's as irrepressible as his father was when he was a lad!" She took on a conspiratorial expression, "When I was a young lass, I remember a certain young lad who gave our father _plenty _of grief with his behavior! I believe they call it _'a parent's revenge'_?" They both laughed quietly, recalling the days of their childhood together.

Paladin stood up--with a little difficulty, feeling the cartilage creek inside his knees. "Oooh! It's when I get up like this that I remember I'm not a tween anymore!" He took the blanket that had covered his younger sister before their conversation, and put it over her shoulders once more, and kissed her forehead. "Go to sleep!" Then added, "You'll need it to deal with Sara in the morning!"


	20. Sara in the Dog House

****

Chapter Twenty: Sara In The Dog House

The colorful autumn leaves no longer clung to their tree limbs. Instead, they littered the ground everywhere in vibrant mounds and scattered with the gusting wind. Eglantine looked out her kitchen window and watched as it 'snowed' red, orange, and gold leaves. She was sad that summer was over; it was her favorite season. Summer was when the children were able to go outside and have fun under the warm sunshine, and their feet run over the soft green turf all the while laughing and singing to their hearts content. She only saw autumn as the in-between part to what usually ended up being a harsh winter. Someone, somewhere in the Shire would not survive to see next spring...that was the way of winter. 

Eglantine shook her gloomy thoughts from her mind and saw again the cool, sunny autumn morn. Working next to her in the kitchen were her daughters and her sister-in-law, Essie. Though for Eglantine, Essie was more than a sister-in-law; she felt more like a sister. Eglantine felt free to claim her as such since all she had while growing up were brothers. Her thoughts were interrupted as clinking dishes and clattering pots announced that breakfast was ready to be served.

Eglantine patted her youngest daughter's shoulder, "Go and tell the others breakfast is ready."

"Yes, ma'am." Pervinca put down the platter of hot cakes she was holding and wiped her hands on her apron. She was eager to taste the sumptuous breakfast she had just helped to cook. Hopefully Merry would notice how fluffy the flapjacks were this morning!

She didn't have far to go because as she entered the hallway she was nearly knocked down by two very hungry young hobbits. "Out of my way!" Yelled the youngest one.

"Pippin!" Eglantine scolded her son, "Mind your manners!"

Merry was slightly more polite, "I'm sorry Pervinca! It's just that I'm starving this morning!"

Eglantine smiled at her nephew, "Well, I'm happy to see you're up and feeling better now, Merry!"

Today was the first day in a long time that he didn't have a headache--not even a tiny bit. His stomach was steady and his ears were clear; nothing sounded as if it were under water.

"Thank you, Auntie! My stomach is happy, too!" He and Pippin started to help themselves to breakfast.

"Merry! You mind your manners as well! Wait for everyone else to sit down, son!" Esmeralda gaped as she watched her son scarf up biscuits, sausage, gravy, and...flapjacks from every platter nearby.

"Papa won't be here for a while--can we eat his portion as well?"

"Absolutely not!" Eglantine chided Pippin, "and what is keeping your father from the breakfast table?"

"He's still sleeping."

Eglantine shook her head. "I just woke him up not a half-hour ago!" She didn't consider it good manners to start a meal without the head of the house at the table, but what else was she to do? Right now there was a table full of hungry children and guests to feed, and it was equally discourteous to keep them waiting. "Very well, everyone go ahead and start breakfast."

After what amounted to a minor all out search of the smial, Eglantine found her husband in the guest's bedroom deep in discussion...with the guest. They spoke in a low key as if the dialogue was for their ears alone. She knew in her heart the subject was Merry, and decided it was best not to disturb them. Eglantine guessed they would come to breakfast whenever their discussion was finished.

"...I think you ought to ask him yourself." Paladin was trying to convince Saradoc to speak to his son about when he intended to return to Buckland--more specifically, Brandy Hall.

"He won't want to talk to me!" Saradoc covered his eyes with one hand; something residual from the night before, and his head throbbed. He sighed at his discomfort, "Now I have an idea of what _he's _been going through this past week!"

"Would you rather I spoke to him?" Paladin made an offer, half hoping Saradoc wouldn't turn it down.

"No!" Saradoc answered. "No... I'll speak to him--as soon as I can speak and not feel as if my head will burst!" Then he said, "but will you consider being present? I have a suspicion he will feel more secure with you nearby, and....so will I."

It wasn't until after lunch when Saradoc was able to think about food and not feel nauseated. He washed his face and padded out to the to the kitchen to pour himself a cup of tea. 

"Well look who's gracing our presence!" Eglantine smirked. She and the cook sat at the table slicing and dicing mushrooms in preparation for canning. "We're getting ready to preserve some of our mushroom harvest for our winter food stores--care for any mushroom stew?" Then a sly grin came to her face, "Or would you simply prefer eggs and sausage with gravy?"

Saradoc held his stomach; reconsidering if he should stay in the kitchen. Obviously, his sister-in-law was having a laugh at his expense. He deserved it. "No, thank you!"

"Sit down, Sara!", she laughed. "I've got a pot of tea boiling just for you."

"Thank you, Tina." Saradoc gratefully accepted the cup of tea Eglantine poured and set in front of him. "Have you seen Essie?"

Eglantine nodded towards the door. "Yes, she's outside with the children snapping beans and peas for preserving. Though I suppose my own Pippin is eating more than he's snapping!"

She leaned closer for him to hear her next words. "Go on!" She whispered, "It's safer with the children around! She not apt to think your head a green bean and _snap _it off!" She smiled as she watched Saradoc grimace when she emphasized the word 'snap'. "Just be extra nice to her today!"

"Thank you.....I think." He mumbled the last part.


	21. Melting the Ice

****

Chapter Twenty-One: Melting the Ice

Saradoc opened the door and was instantly met by the gust of a cool breeze....and light stabbing his sensitive, post-hangover eyes. He shaded his eyes with one hand, and quickly shut the door behind him with the other when he heard Eglantine shriek something about cork stoppers and having to wash them again. The slight hint of a wicked grin appeared on his lips.

It was a clear and bright autumn afternoon, but a blast of cool air sent a chill through Saradoc that reminded him "looks can be deceiving". He wished he'd brought his cloak, but decided the warmth of the sun should warm him up soon enough. He would weather the lower temperatures; he rolled down his shirtsleeves and pulled up the collar against his neck.

He found his wife and the children doing just as Eglantine said, but she forgot to mention the smiles and laughter. Something stirred in his heart. Saradoc felt he wanted to preserve this moment in his mind forever. He stood for a few minutes and surveyed the ring of chairs where his wife, his son Merry, his nieces, and nephew sat wrapped in their own cloaks and blankets enjoying the sunny afternoon. There were several baskets that sat on the ground in the center of the ring; he could see some were full of beans, while some held a small content of the stubs and ends from bean shoots or pea pods. 

He thrust his hands deep into his pockets as another chilly breeze swept by his bare hands. He could barely make out the hint of a tale that his nephew was recounting. The wind would blow snatches of the sounds and scatter the words before they reached his own ears. He watched as the young lad became animated with his hands and expression on his face. The rest of the children paused in their snapping, being enchanted by the charm of a charmer. A couple of his nieces put a hand to their mouths before erupting in laughter, as did the rest of the group, signaling the end of the story. Saradoc was a little sad that it had ended. Watching this little group for the last few minutes brought joy to his weary bones.

At last he approached the ring of chairs. His wife looked up and squinted in the sunlight, "Hullo, Sara."

Saradoc heard the restrained admonishment in her voice. "Hullo, love." He said as he kissed her cheek.

One of the girls chuckled, "It's going to take a little more than _that_, Uncle Sara, if you want to make up!"

"Pimpernel Took!" Pearl chided her sister.

"And how would such a sweet maiden know about that?" He smirked.

Pim blushed, but quickly recovered; she could take it as well as dish it out. "Well, not much in that area, I'm afraid, but all I know is that if _my _husband tipped a bottle without inviting me, he'd have some mighty paying up to do!" This brought a chorus of laughter from all around--even Esmeralda smiled. Pim reached around her chair pulling off the back an extra blanket and tossed it to her uncle. "Why don't you sit with us for a while?"

Saradoc pulled out one of his hands from his pocket and caught the blanket in mid-air. Applause from the young hobbits--with the exception of one whom made it seem as if his hands were a bean-mill. Merry ignored the stares from all around, focusing on the task at hand, then tossed the results of his handiwork into the separate waiting baskets. Saradoc watched his son's hands work feverishly to aid the lad in avoiding a dialogue with him. He knew that humor was the prevailing sentiment today and decided to use it to break the ice. He wrapped the extra blanket around his shoulders and sat down in a chair Pervinca had fetched from the barn. "Must I work that fast? I don't believe I can keep up with him!"

"Then you're sacked!" Pim yelled with a wry grin. She loved her dearest cousin, and wanted to see an amicable end to this silence.

"Goodness! Then how in the Shire will I provide for my family? My nineteen-year-old niece has just given me the boot!"

After an uneasy moment Pippin piped up. "I know!" He said, "I will hire you to shovel the cow and pony dung in the barn for me!" 

Saradoc could see Merry turning his head in the other direction, hiding a smile--all the while still working the beans sitting in his lap. The ice was melting...some. "Why thank you, Master Pippin! Does this employment include feeding the chickens and milking the cows?"

"Why yes it does!" Pippin jested, "and it also includes making my bed and cleaning my room everyday!"

The laughter died down and silence followed once again. Nervous tension threatened to fill the air; it was Pearl who broke it this time. "Are you returning to Buckland tomorrow, Uncle?"

"I had planned on it, Pearl, but plans can always be changed." He looked at his wife.

Esmeralda sighed, "Well...I would like to stay on another day or two. Would that be possible?"

"Then it is done. _If _Paladin and Tina are able to put up with us for two additional days!"

"Good!" Said Pearl, "Aunt Essie, I would love it if you would help us with our jam preserves! All I can imagine these days is the taste of your blackberry jam on my tongue!"

"Mmmmmm!" From all the children--except Merry. Still busy with the beans, though he seemed to be running out of steam a bit.

Momentary silence followed, then Merry finally spoke, "My mother makes the best blackberry jam in all of Buckland."

Saradoc was delighted--yet was careful with his own response, "That she does!" A twinkle shone in his eyes, "Spread over a hot biscuit with a pat of butter!"

Pervinca's stomach growled, "That is hard! Speaking of food like that--and just before teatime!"

The banter continued back and forth between Saradoc and the children, except for Merry--his little statement would be all he'd say to the group--or to his father this afternoon. 


	22. Folks Change

I must apologize for the abrupt ending--in an odd way, I'm glad it's done. Now I can go on to other things. I will do more writing, but not very soon--I've found writing is an outlet for me, and has become an addiction! Thanks to Natta, loveofthering, and Zebra Wallpaper (sorry if I missed anyone) for all your reviews and encouragement! Enjoy!

****

Chapter Twenty-Two: Folks Change

Later that evening, everyone had a job in the canning process: naturally, it was Eglantine, Esmeralda, Pearl, and Pim who prepped and cooked the beans, peas, and jars. With a bit of wax and cork stoppers, Pervinca sealed the jars, Merry poured extra hot wax over the stoppers, and using a small sturdy stick, Pippin would write into the wax the date it was prepared. It was up to Paladin and Saradoc to carry the cooled preserves to the cellar. 

Merry would occasionally help his uncle and father when his tasks allowed it, although due to his recent illness, he would quickly grow tired. On one such trip, he nearly dropped the box of preserves he was carrying. Saradoc, who had just piled his box on top of others, caught the box as it slipped from Merry's grip and helped him ease it to the cellar floor.

****

Saradoc sat down next to Merry on the floor. "Are you all right?"

Merry grew tense, but nodded. For a moment neither spoke. After a while, Saradoc could bear the silence no longer and started to get up. A sharp pain shot through his knee; the one he had injured over the summer, and he fell back down. Merry wondered at this, but said nothing.

Just then Paladin walked in carrying a box of newly cooled jars. "All right, you slackers! Get up and give me your money's worth!"

"Help me get up first, you taskmaster!" Saradoc joked in return. He reached up as Paladin took his hand and made to stand up, but grimaced at the pain and fell back again.

Paladin noticed the swelling in Saradoc's knee. "Sara! What happened to your knee?"

"Nothing--just help me get up."

"I will not! Look at your knee!" Paladin's memory came back to him. "Were you not using a walking stick back at Bag End?"

"Well, if you must know, I had a minor scrape, is all. Now help me up!" Saradoc held forth his hand. 

"You _are _an idiot! You're going to hurt yourself!" Paladin muttered. He gripped Saradoc's hand and supported his upper arm for better leverage, then lifted. Saradoc weighed just a tad more than Paladin and once more fell back onto the cellar floor.

"Merry, would you be willing to help an old ass?" Paladin asked. Merry said nothing, but stood himself up and took his father's other arm.

Paladin looked at his nephew. "On my count: one, two, _three_!" Both he and Merry tugged at Saradoc's arms until he was able to stand. 

"Ahh!" Saradoc winced as he put his weight on his leg.

"Why are you putting yourself through this, Sara?" Paladin watched as his brother-in-law limped towards the door.

"I'm not. I am going to sit for a minute, but I don't want Esmeralda to see me like this."

"Why not? You don't think Essie's going to notice you limping right past her? Give her more credit than that!"

"I just don't want her to worry after me. She won't notice a thing! She's enjoying the company of all the lasses here!"

Paladin and Merry gazed as Saradoc limped up to the threshold of the kitchen. He then straightened up, and walked out towards the main hallway.

"Sara--you should go and sit down before you injure you knee further!" Paladin snickered as he heard his sister's voice scolding her husband. 

Even Merry smirked a little. "Nothing gets by Mum."

"I think maybe he's trying too hard--do you think?" He looked at Merry.

Merry looked down and shrugged. "I don't know yet if he should even be trying at all."

"I wonder the same thing at times, Merry. And perhaps he shouldn't be let off the hook so easily, but this I do know: he does love you."

"If he truly loved me, this impasse wouldn't exist."

"True." Paladin answered. "But people do change--including old hobbits! Someday when you and Pippin are all grown up, I am willing to wager that both of you will make grievous errors against others, or against your own children, and then ask pardon for it. Making mistakes don't stop just because you're out of your tweens!" Paladin smiled and patted Merry's shoulder as he made to leave. "Just think about it, all right?"


	23. Father and Son

****

Chapter Twenty-Three: Father and Son

It was dark in Merry's room and well past midnight, yet it wasn't much more than an hour ago that most everyone had retired to their beds. The evening was full of hard labor with cooking beans, peas and the glass jars (separately of course!) in preserving for the winter food stores. Afterwards, the clean up process took them through to the midnight hour. Eglantine was quite pleased with the progress made that day, and rewarded everyone's effort with a large batch of sugar cookies.

Presently, Merry lay awake in his bed; he was exhausted and felt he would have no problem falling asleep right away. Easier said than done. He tried twisting this way or turning that way, but to no avail. His legs and arms ached, yet Merry was still grateful it wasn't his head that was aching! He lay on his back, his arms behind his head with eyes staring up at the ceiling. He felt he had been doing more and more of this lately!

He was thinking about his father--as his uncle had suggested earlier, when he heard the door handle turn. Unsure of who else would be up this late--or early, he lay as still as a stone pretending to be asleep.

Whoever it was brought a candle with them; Merry noticed his eyelids grew bright. He heard the person shuffle...and limp as they stepped over to grab a chair. _My father!, _he thought. Merry opened one eye to a slit and stole a peek; watching his father labor with the chair. Then he closed it again when he saw Saradoc reach out to.....Merry felt him bring the blankets up to his chin and tuck in the rest of the covers. He heard his father settle into the chair with a heavy sigh.

"Why are you here?" Merry whispered.

Saradoc jumped when he heard Merry's voice. "I'm sorry, Merry! I didn't mean to wake you!" He whispered back. "I only wanted to....to watch you sleep. I'll leave if you want."

"Well...I'm not used to having anyone watch me sleep. I'd feel your eyeballs all over me."

"I understand." Saradoc got up from the chair. Merry watched as his father, once again, made a face when he put his weight on his leg.

"How did you injure your knee? You seemed fine when I left home in Wedmath."

Saradoc turned red at the ears. "I, um....I...." He stammered. At a strange look from his son Saradoc came out with it. "Very well. I fell out of your little cart."

Merry looked incredulous at his father. "You mean my _little wagon_? You _fell _out of my little wagon? How did you manage this?"

"When I found out that you were gone for good, I....I would sit in my study while memories of you filled my head. The memory of the last time you rode your wagon kept playing on my mind. I could again see you and Merimas dragging it up the hillside and then jump inside as it rolled back down towards the stables. I could hear you squealing with laughter as if you were a ten-year-old again." Saradoc smiled.

"I haven't rode down the hill in my wagon since I was twelve. You used to watch me?"

"Through the window." Saradoc replied. "Very few things in this world bring me more pleasure than to hear you laugh, Merry. Your laughter is like a new spring morning; like listening to the laughter of a waterfall."

Merry never knew this. A part of Merry was angry with Saradoc for not sharing this part of his life with him. The other part of him was amused that his father would go to such lengths to touch the memory of his son with a wild ride down a hillside. Saradoc watched the conflict upon his child's face and at once understood the stress he was under.

"Merry, please don't fret over coming home right away. I can see you need time away still. Come home when you're ready, but whatever you do, please stop by every now and then to see your mother. You don't even have to speak to me, but please visit your mum."

"Then I can stay with Uncle Paladin?"

"Yes. I like Frodo well enough, Merry, but he's not quite responsible yet, and well, old Bilbo's getting up in age. And I happen to know that your auntie and Paladin are the only ones in Middle Earth that love you more than we do." He watched as Merry rolled onto his back; his face appeared more relaxed.

"Tell me one thing. Please tell me you rode the little wagon after nightfall and not during the daylight where all of our relations could see you!"

Saradoc was please to tell his tale to his son. "Ah, well, to tell you the truth--I wasn't alone! It was your Uncle Merimac and myself along with a couple mugs of brew inside us that took us up the hill! It was a grand flight down the hill, I'll tell you! But when we reached the bottom, all I can say is that I fared better than my brother!" Saradoc laughed and looked over to Merry to expound on Merimac, but lo and behold--Merry had fallen asleep.

Once again, Saradoc tucked his son in bed, kissed his forehead, and quietly limped out the door.


	24. Making an Effort

****

Chapter Twenty-Four: Making an Effort

A week later, Merry sat under a large Birch not far from the Barn. He was deep in thought as he watched the fluffy white clouds float by. A chilly breeze swept past him, and so he wrapped his cloak tighter around himself to keep warm. The colorful leaves weren't as plentiful as they had been the week before, and Merry knew then that winter was closing in fast. 

"Hullo, Merry!"

Merry startled. He looked up at the figure the voice belonged to and shaded his eyes to see better, but it wasn't necessary. He recognized the silhouette of this hobbit, and immediately knew who it was.

"Hullo, Uncle!" Merry saw he was holding two mugs with steam rising from each.

"Care for some tea?" Paladin leaned down to hand a mug to his nephew.

"Thank you!" Merry took the mug in his cold hands and sipped the hot liquid, nearly burning his lip in the process.

"Careful!" Paladin cautioned him. Keeping an eye on the contents in his own mug, Paladin sat down next to the teenager. "How do you like being an official part-time member of this family?"

Merry actions spoke more loudly than words; he leaned onto his uncle and lay his head on his shoulder. "I wish you were my father _all the time_."

Paladin sighed. "That's a nice wish, Merry. And I must admit, there have been times I've dreamed you were my son." Merry looked at his uncle. Paladin continued, "but we both know that's all it is: a wish." He smiled, "I can't tell you how many times I've told others that I have _five _children!"

"But I am your son!" Merry interjected, wanting to believe it all himself. "For all intents and purposes, you are my father--not my uncle!"

Paladin put his arm around his nephew and brought him closer. "I love you, Merry, as if you were my own flesh and blood! But we both know there is change in the air."

"Why must it change like this? Why couldn't he have stayed in his study without complicating things?"

"Now Merry!" Paladin squeezed him in a tighter hug. "You do have a father, and he wants you back as soon as you are able. He loves you, too, Merry--and don't forget your mother! Why, not a month ago I had a certain sixteen-year-old crying on my shoulder that he wanted his father to love him and take an interest in him! Do you remember that?"

"No."

"Yes you do!" Paladin laughed.

"I said all that because I didn't know then that it would all come true!"

"Well, I suppose it has." Paladin said. "Isn't that a good thing, though?"

It took Merry a few seconds to decide. "I'm not sure--and I don't think I ever will be."

"Perhaps that may be true, but isn't your Brandybuck inquisitiveness coming out? Don't you want to know for sure--beyond all doubt that you have honestly made an effort to get to know the hobbit that sired you?"

"I dare to say that that is all he's done so far!"

"Be reasonable, Merry!"

"I am being reasonable! I'm reasoning that after I make an effort to get to know him, he's going to trot back into his study and forget all about me again."

"Didn't he tell you the story of how he hurt his knee before he left?"

"Yes--and what an embarrassment!"

"Embarrassment?" Paladin chuckled. "I will tell you that when he told me the story, I almost split my gut laughing!" Merry eyed his uncle. "Merry, I was so happy to hear that tale! I knew then that the grumpy-old Saradoc that you've suffered through your whole life was gone--never to return! That's the Sara I grew up with--that's the Sara that was my best friend as a lad." Merry's eyes went wide. "You didn't know that, did you?" 

Merry shook his head. "You and my father were..._best friends_?"

Paladin nodded. "Oh, and I can tell you, he was completely mad! Doing things like riding down a hillside in a wagon was normal for him!" Paladin smiled at the memories. "Between your father, cousin Addie, and myself, we went tramping everywhere in the Shire!" 

Then Paladin grew serious. "Please promise me one thing, Merry."

"What is that, Uncle?"

"That you will make an effort, and that you will allow him to know you. At least try to. Please? For you old uncle's sake?"

Merry paused for a moment. "I will..._for you_."

Paladin hugged Merry closer, "That's all I ask, and you won't regret it!"

Merry enjoyed the comfort of his uncle's shoulder. "That remains to be seen, but I will give him a 'try' as you say."

The two hobbits, young and old, sat in comfortable silence for a while before going back inside the warmth of the smial. Merry savored the last few moments with his uncle--this being the last page of his life without Saradoc, his own father.

~~The End!!~~ 

Until a new continuing saga comes to mind!


End file.
